The Smile at the Foot of the Ladder by Henry Miller

Author:Henry Miller
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-8112-2438-3
Publisher: New Directions
Published: 1948-08-29T16:00:00+00:00

Next morning the papers were full of Antoine’s praises. Auguste had, of course, explained his project to the boss before retiring that night. It was agreed that every precaution would be taken to keep the plan a secret. Since none but the members of the troupe knew of Antoine’s illness, and since Antoine himself was still in ignorance of the glorious future which had been prepared for him, the outlook seemed relatively cheerful.

Auguste, of course, could scarcely wait to pay the promised visit to Antoine. He had decided not to show him the newspapers immediately but to simply let him know what he hoped to accomplish during the few brief days in which Antoine would be incapacitated. He had to win Antoine over before revealing to him the full extent of his accomplishment, otherwise Antoine might be intimidated by a success which he had acquired ready-made. All this Auguste rehearsed step by step before heading for Antoine’s quarters. Not once did it occur to him that what he was about to propose was beyond Antoine’s power of acceptance.

He held himself back until almost noon, hoping that by that time Antoine would be in the proper mood to receive him. When he set forth he was jubilant. He was certain he could convince Antoine that the heritage he was leaving him was a legitimate one. “After all,” he said to himself, “it’s just a little push I’m giving him. Life is full of little dodges which we must avail ourselves of. No man gets there alone, unaided.” With this off his chest, he almost began to trot. “I’m not cheating or robbing him,” he continued. “He always wanted to be famous, now he is famous! or he will be a week from now. Antoine will be Antoine … only more so. That’s all there is to it. All it needs sometimes is just a little accident, a trick of fortune, a push from the beyond, and there you are—out in the limelight and on all fours.”

Here he recalled his own sudden rise to fame. What had he, Auguste, to do with it? What had been a mere accident was acclaimed overnight as a stroke of genius. How little the public understood! How little any one understood, where fate was concerned. To be a clown was to be fate’s pawn. The life in the arena was a dumb show consisting of falls, slaps, kicks—an endless shuffling and booting about. And it was by means of this disgraceful rigolade that one found favor with the public. The beloved clown! It was his special privilege to reenact the errors, the follies, the stupidities, all the misunderstandings which plague human kind. To be ineptitude itself, that was something even the dullest oaf could grasp. Not to understand, when all is clear as daylight; not to catch on, though the trick be repeated a thousand times for you; to grope about like a blind man, when all signs point the right direction; to insist on opening

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