The Redneck Guide to Raisin' Children by Annie Smith

Author:Annie Smith
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9781466877849
Publisher: St. Martin's Press

Bedtime Stories and Lullabies

The redneck’s second Bible ain’t a book—it’s all the great country songs.

And country music makes wonderful bedtime lullabies. Many songs are so mournful and lonesome that your young’uns will cry themselves to sleep.

A big dose of heartache works twice as fast as Sominex at bedtime, according to Professor Harland K. Sampson.

Just put a radio by your kid’s bedside, tune in a country station, and within minutes she’ll be sound asleep on her tearstained pillow.

And you don’t have to worry about dirty lyrics. You won’t find them in country songs. Our music teaches clean living and respect for women. The only “ho” you’ll hear is in “hoedown.”

Country songs also will teach your young’uns to respect their parents and to never blame you for the way they turn out. Make sure your kids hear Merle Haggard’s great tearjerker “Mama Tried,” in which he sings, “Mama tried to raise me better … now there’s only me to blame, ’cause Mama tried.”

Religion and love for animals also are big themes in country songs. The song “Feed Jake” is about a man praying that after he kicks the bucket, his best friend—his dog—will get fed.

With all this inspiring stuff already recorded, why spend time telling bedtime stories or singing lullabies to your kids? You’ve got better things to do—like making more kids.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.