Seven Transforming Gifts of Menopause by Cheryl Bridges Johns

Author:Cheryl Bridges Johns
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Christian Living/Women;Menopause—Religious aspects—Christianity;Middle-aged women—Religious life;Middle-aged women—Health and hygiene;REL012130;REL012120;HEA051000
ISBN: 9781493422289
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
Published: 2020-01-03T00:00:00+00:00

JOANN

When Joann came to seminary, she worked hard to be liked by everyone. The word most used to describe her was sweet. Joann had a knack for flattering people in authority. All too often she would assume the stance of a too eager learner ready to give away her ideas to support the person speaking.

I enjoyed watching Joann make the journey from passive receiver to questioning student. In seminary classes, professors encouraged Joann to read and think critically. She was given permission to ask questions. During this time, she worked as my teaching assistant. I would often challenge her to express her own opinions and not merely the words of others.

During her second year in seminary, Joann was asked to attend a women’s retreat. She did not want to go because, as she told me, she did not agree with all the teachings of the retreat leaders. But being “nice,” Joann did not want to offend her relative who had agreed to sponsor her at the conference. She packed her bags and went to the retreat anyway.

A couple of days later, Joann called to inform me that she had been kicked out of the retreat. She described how, on arrival, each participant was given a workbook. As the speaker lectured, the women eagerly filled in the blanks, writing down the speaker’s words verbatim. No one thought to question the speaker or to probe the material in search of deeper meaning. The retreat speaker never asked for questions. She merely encouraged the women to write down her words.

Joann resisted the expectation that she sit passively and fill in the blanks of her notebook. Instead, she practiced what she had learned in seminary—namely, asking probing questions, especially the why question. After the first morning session, the conference director took Joann aside and asked her not to be so disruptive. By midafternoon, Joann had been asked to leave the retreat. “You do not have a submissive spirit, Joann,” said the director. “I encourage you to pray and ask God to give you more of a humble and learning heart.”

When Joann shared this information with me, she was stinging from the rebuke. “Is there something wrong with me?” she asked. I encouraged Joann to notice how the conference was designed. The design revealed the mind-set that the women were receivers and not required to think for themselves. This design was not suitable for Joann, who, after attending seminary, had become an active, constructive learner. Perhaps Joann could have used more wisdom in her responses to the retreat leadership, but I was proud of her transformation.

Joann graduated from seminary and went on to become a denominational executive. In this role, she represented her tradition in international ecumenical venues. She now serves as a pastor. The journey from being a silent learner to being a critical thinker empowered Joann to believe in her own thoughts and to honor her own gifts. In other words, Joann had to become “a disruptive student” in order to become a good student!

The move to being a subject is a move toward honor and empowerment.

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