Rocking Autumn by Alyne Hart

Author:Alyne Hart
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: small town, rock star, rocker romance, rockstar romance, second chance romance, long distance relationship, fantasy, independent woman, new adult, single dad romance, secret baby romance, alpha male, steamy romance, cocky male, cocky romance, single daddy, bookstore romance, tattooed love, musician romance
Publisher: Alyne Hart
Published: 2018-03-14T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twenty-Three

Autumn

AS IF I DIDN’T KNOW this already. I have no clue what I’m doing.

I miss Jaxon so badly that it hurts physically. How those eight weeks turned into what I feel now is beyond me. My arms ache to hold him. Even knowing that in just a week and a half, I get to see him again, it’s just not enough.

And I miss Hadley. I had no idea how intertwined I was with her until she was gone.

By my count, I have left no less than thirty-three text messages, sixteen voicemails, and countless Facebook messages. She hasn’t returned a single one.

I’m acting like a crazy ex the way I’ve been trying to reach her. My next step is to stand outside her house with a boombox blasting a Peter Gabriel song.

On one, sad, lonely occasion I went to PH 124 for a Campari cocktail by myself. It just wasn’t the same. Cole and his bright blond hair and pink-cheeked grin were the same. My drink tasted no different. The bar still echoed with music, conversation, and the sound of ice clinking against glass and metal shakers. But nothing is the same. It feels like everything is moving around me, and I’m standing still. It’s disturbing, to say the least.

I haven’t completely run the store into the ground. Yet, anyway. All the orders have shown up on time, even if I screwed a few of them up. The shelves are mostly organized. Coffee gets brewed. Cupcakes get baked. Books get sold. Slowly. But they get sold.

It’s quieter now, and it’s lonely. I haven’t had it in me to try and replace her. Because I can’t replace her.

It’s been two weeks of thirteen hour days. I’m surviving, and only because of take-out Thai, cappuccino, and dry shampoo.

When I get the notice today that rent is going up again on my leased space, I spend most of the day in my office crying. And not those pretty, soft tears that roll elegantly down actresses face in the movies. Big, hard, ugly tears that stain the front of my shirt and retching sobs that leave my stomach aching.

All I want to do is talk to Jax. See his face, hear his voice. Have his presence, even if it is only through my computer screen, to soothe me.

I race home from work, dab concealer on the dark purple rings beneath my eyes, spray another layer of dry shampoo on my hair and brush it out. Logging onto the computer I’m eager. My heart beats rapidly, and I sigh. On the other end of the computer, it just rings. And rings. And ring.

That’s four days in a row.

Soon enough I know I’ll get a text. ‘Sorry, I had something going on.’ ‘Sorry, stuck at work.’ ‘Sorry, won’t be home until late.’

Sitting at my kitchen table, staring at my laptop with a styrofoam bowl of noodles in hand, I gulp back the lump in my throat. I sigh and look at a card taped to my fridge that Hadley gave me for my birthday.

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