I'm Ok by Patti Kim

Author:Patti Kim
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Atheneum Books for Young Readers

twenty-three

My mother and I shop at Sears for a new pair of jeans and sneakers for me. “As an early Christmas present,” she says. There’s a Korean adage that says if you buy shoes for someone as a gift, you’re really telling him to run away. Put these new shoes on and get lost.

My mother gets enough kimchi orders that she doesn’t have to sew sleeves or work on the weekends at Arirang Grocery anymore. Word got around about her kimchi, and people who don’t even go to our church are ordering jars. Our home has gone from being a sewing factory to a kimchi factory.

While her kimchi business grows, my braiding business is steady but slow. I’ve managed to save forty-two dollars. I was thinking about giving it to my mother, but it doesn’t look like she needs the money anymore.

My mother pays for my sneakers, then wanders over to the women’s clothing department. I wander over to sporting goods. As I leave the aisle of fishing rods, I see the most amazing display. A family of mannequins is camping. The dad stands next to the tent, which is as big as a real house and is a color Crayola calls Shamrock. The boy stands near the fire, made out of jagged pieces of red cardboard. The girl stands with her mom, who’s boiling water in a kettle that sits on a portable stove the size of a dictionary. The Styrofoam snow is pure and beautiful. The family is frozen in a moment of happiness.

I carefully walk over to the tent, push open the flap, and look inside. Four puffy sleeping bags are lined up on the floor. I step into the tent, zipper shut the door, and then, like Goldilocks, try out all the sleeping bags. The boy’s green one is just right. I am cocooned. The air smells fresh, like brand-new shower curtains. The tent’s ceiling glows green from the store’s fluorescent lights and hypnotizes me: You’re getting sleepy. You’re getting a tent. Your own home. Your hollow tree.

“Assistance needed in shoes.”

The voice, which sounds like the school secretary’s, springs me out of the sleeping bag. I bolt out of the tent like I’m escaping a crime scene.

I hurry to the aisle of tents, which are boxed and shelved according to size. The smallest is a two-person tent called the Shelter 365. Lightweight but tough. No stakes needed. Erects quickly. Durable mesh window and door. Nylon wraparound floor to keep out moisture and bugs. Cost: $59.99.

I want the Shelter 365. I need the Shelter 365. Without it, there is no way to escape. I must run away. Dump before you get dumped. Leave before you get kicked out. It’s inevitable. Deacon Koh is on his way in, and I’m on my way out. My mother doesn’t need me anymore. And with the Shelter 365, I won’t need her.

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