All the Little Bones by Ellie Marney

Author:Ellie Marney
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: YA Dark Romance
Publisher: Bearded Lady Press
Published: 2018-07-27T16:00:00+00:00

Seven

The police are speaking to one of the stage-hands, who seems to be deferring to a more senior member of the ring crew. My cue is fast approaching. I’ve just remembered to breathe again, and now I might start hyperventilating.

‘Sorsha, are you okay?’ Dita is looking at me strangely.

‘Yes.’ I’m so well-trained, my first response is a lie. Then my stomach cramps, suddenly and painfully, and I come to my senses. I grip Dita’s hand. ‘No. No. Oh god. I don’t think I can do this.’

‘What are you talking about?’ She looks flabbergasted.

‘I can’t go up there.’ I drag my eyes away from the police officers at the back of the tent. Stare up, past the black curtain, to the tilt. I can see the detail on the trapeze platforms from here. Everything looks really close up and very far away, all at the same time. Which is bad. ‘Dita, I don’t think I can perform.’

If I go onstage for the spot, the police will get a great view of me for sure. I can’t let that happen. The nerves I was feeling before are now amplified by a factor of ten million. Sweat is pouring off me. My breaths pile on top of each other. If I was up on the platform this minute, I think I’d throw up.

‘I feel sick.’ My excuse sounds genuine because it’s real. ‘God, I can’t do this.’

Dita must read the panic in my face. She frowns and grips my hand in return. ‘Oh, honey. You actually do look bad. Are you sure it’s not just stage fright?’

‘This isn’t my first stage!’

‘And you don’t think it’ll pass once you’re out there?’ She sees my eyes. ‘Okay, okay, let’s find one of the backstage crew and get the message to Luke.’

As she casts around for the nearest black-garbed crew member, she keeps hold of my clammy hand. I glance back–the police officers at the edge of the tunnel have spoken with the senior crew, and are now being escorted inside the backstage area. People are looking over curiously.

I turn my face away–my whole body, in fact. I turn so far that Dita is forced to twist to stay connected with me while talking to the runner who’s come over.

‘…radio through. Tell Luke Rogan he’s down a flyer on this side. Tell him I’m taking her to medical.’ She tugs back. ‘Sorsha, let’s get you away from the wings, for safety’s sake.’

‘Air.’ My windpipe is constricted; I’m sucking for breath through a straw. It’s like I’m having an allergic reaction to the police presence. ‘Get me some air.’

She bustles me away from the wings. I don’t care what direction I go in, as long as it’s away from the mingers and not into the ring. My vision is getting spotty. What’s important right now is that I’ve got my back to the police. They can’t see my face.

I lower my head, thinking about my distinctive hair. It’s because I’ve got my face pointed at the ground that I bump into Colm, who’s coming from the other direction.

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