1, 2, Can't Reach My Shoe by Ross Petras

Author:Ross Petras [Ross; Petras, Kathryn]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-4494-0214-3
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
Published: 2010-08-15T00:00:00+00:00

10

When Petula was in her twenties, TEN o’clock meant the whole night was still ahead of her. There was so much to do. She could go dancing! Or to the new club! Or meet a cute guy for some hot romance!

Now that Petula is middle-aged, TEN o’clock still means there’s so much to do! She can watch TV! Or a DVD! Or go to bed! And sleep!

11

“Shoveling the snow is good for my health,” Howie always says. But today he has discovered that snow shoveling is not good for his middle-aged back.

Yes, Howie has developed the ELEVEN symptoms of a herniated disk: He has (1) back pain (2) in his lower back, which is worse with (3) movement, (4) coughing, (5) sneezing, (6) laughing, and (7) “fecal straining.” He also has (8) sudden back pain when twisting and (9) bending, plus (10) back numbness and (11) local muscle weakness.

Hey, Howie! ELEVEN is certainly not your lucky number!

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