Win or Learn by Harlan Cohen

Author:Harlan Cohen
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sourcebooks
Published: 2020-08-25T00:00:00+00:00

Change What You Don’t Love, Tolerate What You Can’t Change

What is your truth? When you look in the mirror, what do you see?

I’m a white male who is five feet five and a half inches, and I weigh 162 pounds. My ears stick out. I’m forty-seven years old. I was born in the United States. I’m a writer and speaker. I graduated from Indiana University. I’m married with three children. My sense of humor is dry and sarcastic. I’m Jewish (some people will hate me for this). I can’t control what anyone thinks about me. So I’ve stopped trying. All I can do is change what I don’t love and tolerate what I can’t change.

What others think of me is none of my business. What you think about me is none of my business.

What I Can Change

I can change my weight, my sense of humor, my religion, and my career.

I can gain or lose weight, stop being funny, convert to a new religion, stop writing, and become a professional bowler or weatherman (two dreams).

What I Can’t Change

I can’t change my height, my skin color, where I was born, my ears, and my age.

I will always be a short white man from the United States who is getting older. I could get my ears surgically stitched to my head, but that would change who I am. It also might make me too good-looking. I give the world permission to not always like me or love me. I know that I’m worthy of love and have value.

When people judge me or reject me, I’m curious. I want to know why. You should be curious too. I mean, why would anyone not appreciate you or your ideas? If people I value in my life don’t like me or my thoughts or my ideas, I want to listen and learn. Again, information is not emotional. It informs me.

Whoever you are, wherever you’re from, no matter your gender, sexual orientation, race, religion, height, weight, challenges, obstacles, or upbringing, you are a beautiful person who is worthy of it all. Start by loving yourself and believing that nothing and no one can devalue you.

Look at yourself in the mirror.

Face the truth. The comfortable truth. The uncomfortable truth.

Don’t hate, hide, attack, or blame.

Just face the truth. Love yourself. Change what you don’t love. Tolerate what you can’t change. And give the world permission to respond freely.

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