Unravelling D'Artagnan by Fi Whyms

Author:Fi Whyms
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Fi Whyms
Published: 2023-09-08T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Nine

D’Artagnan’s return seemed to release the tension in both my body and my mind. As the month of May started, I started to feel increasingly tired. I struggled to wake in the mornings, and I felt sleepy after lunch. It was the most marvellously luxurious thing to do, to finish my tea in the morning and then snuggle back down under the duvet with Mrs Muffin and dive back into the velvet blackness.

‘You are tired, mon ange. You must sleep some more.’ D’Artagnan was sitting next to me on the bed, stroking my hair off my face. ‘I take care of the animals and my projet.’

I frowned sleepily. ‘What project?’

He smiled sweetly. ‘Just a little projet. I take care of it, don’t worry.’

But my eyes were already closing again and I was sinking into the welcoming darkness. I didn’t really care what his ‘leetle projet’ was; if it kept him busy then it was a good thing, given that I’d rather torpedoed his joint venture with Satan and the Queen of the Rottweilers.

The luxurious sleep interlude ended abruptly when the leetle projet kicked off. It was not at all leetle; it was a bloody massive project that involved a lot of heavy machinery that arrived at 7am on Monday of the following week.

I stood at the bedroom window staring out at the huge digger ripping up the lawn in front of the kitchen window. I could feel the Duchess vibrating with anger under my bare feet. Shaking my head, I turned to D’Artagnan. ‘When exactly did you decide to press “go” on the swimming pool?’

He was pulling on his T-shirt. ‘Bah, we talk about la piscine last year, Nicole. We need to have it ready for the summer.’

‘But we haven’t discussed it properly. We haven’t discussed any of the detail!’ I protested.

Little shrug, pout. ‘Bah, ouais, of course we discuss it. You say if I change the shape and make the pool at the side of the chateau you will be happy. So I do that. I tell the architect and she draw up the plan.’ He smiled brightly, fluttered the charming eyelashes.

I stared back at him tiredly, shook my head again and headed towards the bed. I propped up some pillows behind me and sat back as I reached for my coffee. It didn’t taste very nice so I put it down again and took a sip of water instead. ‘When were you doing all this?’

‘In Donostia.’ He went into the bathroom and I heard him unzip his shorts and start peeing.

‘Sulking, surfing and swimming-pool design. You were a busy little bunny, weren’t you?’

‘Quoi?’ he shouted.

‘Nothing,’ I shouted back. ‘It’s just that it would have been nice to discuss it a bit more before you made a unilateral decision to turn the front garden into Agincourt.’

He came back into the bedroom, zipping up his shorts and frowning. ‘Do you not want a piscine, Nicole? Last year, you said “this would be nice, Guy, to have a swimming pool”. Now, you don’t want a piscine?’

I took another sip of water.

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