The Relate Guide to Sex and Intimacy by Cate Campbell

Author:Cate Campbell
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781473527485
Publisher: Ebury Publishing

Chapter Ten

Physical Limitations

Despite not having been advised to give up sex, many people are nonetheless convinced that a physical setback is incompatible with lovemaking. A surprising number of those with a medical diagnosis are afraid to have sex or to ask for help, yet there are usually numerous ways to assist them to have sexual experiences safely and comfortably. Even people with significant spinal cord injuries and paralysis are able to be sexual, many enjoying orgasm and penetration. This isn’t to say that physical challenges are always easily overcome. It often takes perseverance and creativity. However, the first step to making changes is to develop a positive attitude which allows you to see yourself as a sexual being and part of a sexual couple.

Some people feel that it is wrong to be sexual when they are ill and that they will be judged. Often, performance anxiety and embarrassment about having to ask partners to adjust simply prevents them from being sexual at all. However, for many conditions, experimentation and expanding one’s sexual repertoire can offer numerous opportunities for sexual experiences.

Health professionals are sometimes reluctant to mention sex in case patients find the conversation intrusive or the timing is wrong, but this doesn’t mean they aren’t willing and able to help. Moreover, related charities and support organisations nearly all have information about sex on their website. Some also have helplines and specialist staff who have the knowledge and experience to advise you. Your GP or practice nurse should also know of expert organisations in your area. Some of the national support groups are listed at the end of the book (see here). Do use them; the information in this chapter is only intended as a first step to encourage you to seek and obtain the professional medical support you need.

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