The Power of a Positive friend by Karol Ladd & Terry Ann Kelly

Author:Karol Ladd & Terry Ann Kelly
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Howard Publishing
Published: 2004-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

How Do You Choose?

Why is it that girls, upon entering the fourth grade, seem to disappear into the “catty zone” and don’t reappear until they’re about seventeen? When our daughters were this age, they began coming home with stories about different little girls in their classes who were mad at each other one day and best friends the next. They would say things like, “Cathy isn’t friends with Lauren anymore, and Hailey’s new best friend is Robin.”

We used these stories as opportunities to teach our girls what true friendship is all about. We both told our daughters, “If you hear a girl speaking badly about another girl behind her back, you can count on that same girl talking behind your back too.” We explained that by observing the behavior of their classmates over time, they would be able to choose friends who would prove faithful.

Choosing friends is not something we should do in a haphazard way. Jonathan observed David and saw that he had a heart for God. He observed David’s loyalty toward his father, King Saul. His observations led him to the conclusion that David would be a loyal and trustworthy friend—a wonderful friend of the heart.

Teaching our daughters at early ages the value of observing people in order to choose friends wisely is a lesson that should serve them well throughout life. Many times, catty little girls grow into catty women. They have never learned to be secure in who God has made them to be. Therefore, even as grown women—and yes, even grown women in the church—they are still trying to make themselves look better (in their own eyes at least) by belittling others.

If you are missing the emotional closeness that true friendship brings, ask the Lord to bring the right friends into your life. Carefully observe the women in your neighborhood, office, school, or church before choosing whom you want to be close to. Remember, you do have a choice! Then as the Lord, in his timing, deepens these special relationships, be willing to be open to your friends and trust them with your heart.

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