Teenagers 101 by Deurlein Rebecca;

Author:Deurlein, Rebecca;
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780814434666
Publisher: HarperCollins Christian Publishing (AMACOM titles)

Unhealthy overinvolvement includes:

•Asking teachers to post homework assignments online or send them home so you can remind your kids of all their work. Sure, it’s nice to be in the know, and if teachers willingly post this information it’s a bonus for you. But kids have to take responsibility for writing down assignments and deadlines without counting on you to remind them. When you are privy to this information, use it for your own decision making (He can’t go out tonight because I know he has a test tomorrow), but don’t use it to take the responsibility away from your children.

• Doing homework, papers, or projects for kids.

• Telling other adults how to do their jobs. Thinking you could teach it or coach it better is one thing; saying it out loud is quite another.

• Reminding kids daily of the places they need to be, including practices, meetings, and jobs. They will never learn to keep a calendar or write a to-do list if you already serve as their constant reminder.

• Calling teachers for clarification on assignments. If your children didn’t listen, they should be the ones to approach the teacher for clarification or to come up with an alternate way to get the information they need. Doing this for them just enables them.

• Living vicariously through your kids. This includes forcing kids to pursue your interests, or seeing their successes or failures as your own.

• Asking for extensions, exceptions, or complete forgiveness when kids don’t do their jobs. Again, they have to deal with the consequences. If you shield them now, they’ll just pay later, and in a much bigger way.

• Insisting on checking all their work before they turn it in.

• Checking their notebooks and otherwise micromanaging their everyday lives. Give them space to discover methods that work for them. Their note-taking systems might look like scribbles to you, but they likely make perfect sense to them.

• Placing focus on grades rather than learning.

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