Restless by Kaylene Winter

Author:Kaylene Winter
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: rock star, rockstars, modern romance, rock star sex, prequel story, free novella, rockstar love, novellas free, rockstar hero, novella ebook
Publisher: Kaylene Winter

CHAPTER 7

CARTER

Ten years later

Oh, I screwed it up.

Big time.

By the middle of the second big tour, our first as headliners, I was fully addicted to heroin. It all started when I went off the wagon and did some lines with our opening band in Memphis. The coke was laced with smack. For a man predisposed to addiction like me, it was all over after that night. A year in, and nothing mattered to me but the euphoria of being high. Not Lianne. Not Zane. Not Limelight. Nothing.

Oh, I went through the motions. I hid my habit well for a long time. Mainly because my preference was snorting, so there was little-to-no physical evidence of my drug abuse.

Unless you counted how skinny and jittery I’d become if I didn’t get my fix.

Irritable.

Reclusive.

Angry.

My erratic behavior and inability to stay faithful wrecked my relationship with Lianne. She finally left me for good when I couldn’t stay clean. I was home for a few months after touring. Lianne was the principal in Romeo and Juliet. While she was away at a matinee performance, I passed out for several hours when I was supposed to be watching six-year-old Zane. When she returned, he was screaming bloody murder. Pounding on my chest, trying to wake me up. To no avail. It traumatized him.

I’d destroyed what was already a fragile relationship with my son.

He didn’t trust me anymore.

Couldn’t trust me anymore.

Oh, I felt terrible. Remorseful even.

Just not enough to miss an appointment with my dealer under the Alaskan Way Viaduct the next day.

When I returned home from my bender a few days later, Lianne and Zane were gone. Moved out. She left a note. She’d quit the PNB and joined the Colorado Ballet. Although it wasn’t as prestigious a company, it had been in the works for months. She wanted a new life for herself and for Zane and thought moving closer to her parents and away from me was her best shot.

I didn’t blame her.

I was a terrible partner.

A terrible father.

An addict.

I didn’t deserve her. Or him.

Now twelve, the only time I saw Zane was when the band played in Denver. Once a year, at best. Lianne’s parents always facilitated the meeting, and I was never left alone with him. “Too dangerous,” Lianne said. Our time together was awkward. I didn’t know what to say to him. He didn’t want to talk to me.

We were strangers.

Until we played guitar.

Then, we were kindred spirits.

We spoke to each other through music.

In the end, that was always what pulled me through.

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