No More Mr. Nice Guy by Robert Glover

Author:Robert Glover [Glover, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Ensayo, Autoayuda
Publisher: ePubLibre
Published: 2001-01-01T05:00:00+00:00

Chapter 6

Reclaim Your Masculinity

Contrary to the prevailing sentiments of the last few decades, it is OK to be a guy.

Men born after World War II had the misfortune of growing up during the only era of recent western history in which it was not always a good thing to be male. This was primarily the result of two significant family and social changes in the post war era: 1) boys were disconnected from their fathers and other healthy male role models, and 2) boys were forced to seek approval from women and accept a female definition of what it meant to be male.

As a result of these two dynamics, many boys and men came to believe that they had to hide or eliminate any negative male traits (like those of their fathers or other «bad» men) and become what they believed women wanted them to be. For many men, this life strategy seemed essential if they wanted to be loved, get their needs met, and have a smooth life.

Due to the continuing social change of the last half of the 20th century, this belief system is no longer limited to just men of the baby boom generation. I frequently observe men in their thirties, twenties, and teens, with strong Nice Guy traits. It seems that each successive generation of men are becoming more and more passive.

This social conditioning effects Nice Guys in many ways:

Nice Guys tend to be disconnected from other men.

Nice Guys tend to be disconnected from their own masculinity.

Nice Guys tend to be monogamous to their mothers.

Nice Guys tend to be dependent on the approval of women.

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