Nipper by Mitchell Charlie

Author:Mitchell, Charlie [Mitchell, Charlie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780007362868
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2008-12-09T11:00:00+00:00

Although I had Calum, Shane and Tommy, Bonnie is still – and will always be – the very best friend I’ve ever had. Even though she’s a huge long-haired German Shepherd with teeth like a wolf, she’s a really friendly dog, especially with kids. We’d roll about the floor play-fighting together for hours. I grab her in a head lock and pretend to bite her ear, making a playful, snarling noise, then she wriggles out of it and pins my arms down with her paws, puts her massive, powerful jaw around my neck and makes the same noise back. This game can last for hours. We crawl around on all fours, taking each other’s legs away, but she always treats me the same way a lion mother treats a new-born cub. We trust each other one hundred per cent.

But on one occasion Bonnie’s not in the mood for playtime, as my brown Y-fronts soon realise. Tommy is over, staying for the weekend at Dad’s, and Bonnie’s in season again. She’s always grumpy with people at times like this, but hey, what woman isn’t! When Bonnie’s like this I seem to be the only person who can go near her – well, until this particular morning. Tommy and I go downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast, passing Bonnie in the living room. I pat her head as I walk past in my underpants and she seems fine as she wags her tail. After breakfast she jumps up to start our morning play ritual – as I often do, I turn so that my back is to her, and then walk backwards towards her. That way, she can’t get my hands.

As I back her into the corner with my backside, Tommy’s laughing and says, ‘She’s gonna bite your arse one o’ these days!’

All of a sudden, before I can say ‘No, she won’t,’ I feel her teeth grab my left butt cheek as she’s now pushing me out of the corner and across the room.

She never breaks the skin though and I will always believe ever after that she understood what Tommy had said, and that she actually has a human sense of humour.

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