Nanny Piggins and the Daring Rescue 7 by R. A. Spratt

Author:R. A. Spratt [Spratt, R. A.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Humanities; sciences; social sciences; scientific rationalism
ISBN: 9781742754987
Publisher: Random House Australia
Published: 2012-09-05T04:00:00+00:00

When Nanny Piggins arrived at Mr Green’s office, she found him to be his usual charming self. ‘You’re late,’ snapped Mr Green.

Nanny Piggins looked at her watch. ‘Only by fifteen seconds.’

‘That’s still late,’ said Mr Green.

As a boss he liked to rule with an iron fist. Nanny Piggins had not noticed this working for Mr Green at home, because she liked to rule with a diamond-studded fist (and as any elemental chemist can tell you, diamonds are a lot harder than iron).

‘It’s polite to be late,’ said Nanny Piggins.

‘You’d better get started. There’s a lot to do,’ declared Mr Green.

‘I can see that,’ said Nanny Piggins, looking around his office. It was a shabby, old-fashioned room with no windows because it was in the basement of the law firm. (Even lawyers do not like tax lawyers.) There were filing cabinets on one wall, tax law books on another and a third devoted to Mr Green’s framed law degree (from a very mediocre university). Everything on Mr Green’s desk was as neat as it could be. (He had spent the last half hour using a protractor and spirit level to achieve this.)

Just outside Mr Green’s door was another smaller office. This was where the secretary worked. There were even more filing cabinets, stacks of archive boxes and a desk with trays full of paper.

‘Where do you want me to start?’ asked Nanny Piggins. ‘Do you want me to burn your hideous clothes? Or paint the walls an attractive fuchsia? Or perhaps I should get some incense. It smells of something peculiar down here –’ Nanny Piggins sniffed about – ‘Rotting cockroaches, that’s what it is, the faint smell of rotting cockroaches.’

‘Don’t be absurd,’ said Mr Green. ‘You don’t have time to be distracted by interior decoration or aromatherapy.’

‘And you don’t find the rotting cockroaches to be distracting?’ asked Nanny Piggins.

‘There is paperwork to do!’ exclaimed Mr Green, as though ‘paperwork’ was the most sacred mission entrusted to a mere mortal. He pointed to the trays on Mrs Applebaum’s desk. ‘This tray has to be typed up, this tray has to be filed and this tray has to be researched in the legal library.’

‘Aha,’ said Nanny Piggins, nodding her head.

‘I need you to answer all my calls, open all my mail and most important of all –’ said Mr Green, pausing dramatically for emphasis.

‘You want me to get you some teeth whitener?’ guessed Nanny Piggins.

‘No!’ exclaimed Mr Green. ‘I need you to make me a cup of tea.’

‘Okay,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘Would you like that with or without spit in it?’

‘What?’ spluttered Mr Green.

‘Don’t worry,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘I’ll surprise you.’

Mr Green got the message. ‘I’ll make my own tea. You do everything else.’

‘Absolutely,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘You run along to the break room. Let me get started on this paperwork.’

As soon as Mr Green left the room Nanny Piggins piled the filing, the typing and the research into one pile, opened a window and threw it out. (She did have to

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