How to Make Anyone Fall in Love With You by Leil Lowndes

Author:Leil Lowndes [Lowndes, Leil]
Language: eng
Format: epub, pdf
Tags: Seduction
ISBN: 9780809229895
Amazon: 0809229897
Publisher: McGraw-Hill
Published: 1997-09-01T22:00:00+00:00

PART FOUR

EQUITY

THE "WIIFM" PRINCIPLE OF LOVE (WHAT'S IN IT FOR

ME?)

Page 161

24

Everybody's Got a Market Value, Baby

During a heated argument, a man I once loved snarled at me, "Everybody's got a value on the open market, baby." I was appalled. How crass! How could he see people as commodities, especially somebody he said he loved? What a repulsive way to look at relationships!

To me, love was beautiful. Love was pure. It was the source of the most intense pleasure known to mankind and had no parallel in human experience. To me, love was sharing, trusting, total giving of self. The words of Robert Burns had reverberated in my heart since childhood: "Love, 0 lyric Love, half angel and half bird. And all a wonder and a wild desire." To hear my lover liken his loved one's qualities to pork bellies or soybeans on the commodities market was too much. I stormed out of the room. And, soon thereafter, out of the relationship.

Now, many years later, older and, some few could argue, wiser, I wonder, "Was he right?" Not in his manner of presentation, certainly. But in his facts? It surprises no one to hear, "Everyone wants to get the best deal possible in life." Nor are they shocked when they learn about the law of supply and demand in business. People don't even flinch when sales gurus preach that, in all human interaction, the big question is WIIFM —(what's in it for me?)

Page 162

Why do we recoil when researchers tell us the same natural laws apply to love?

Recently, the scientific community, not content with the theories of love proposed by Sigmund Freud (sublimated sexuality) or Theodore Reik (filling a void in oneself), set out to get the real skinny on love. Conducting numerous surveys and laboratory experiments, scientists peeled back a deeper layer of the human psyche. Did they uncover some ugly facts? Did they confront a monster? Some might say "yes." Others would laugh it off and say, "Of course not."

Whether you see their findings as the abominable snowman or the archangel of truth, the result is quite simply this: Studies do indeed support the thesis that everything and everybody has a quantifiable value on the open market. And everybody wants to get the best deal possible in love as well as in life. Researchers christened their findings the equity (or exchange) theory of love. It's sort of like the old horse-trading principle.

Why Is Finding Love Like Horse Trading?

The equity theory of love is based on the same sound business principles of barter and open market value. Everything has a value. Everything has a price. As with that of a product, a person's value can be subjective. Generally, the world agrees on what's a good catch and what's a shoddy one.

In the world of horse trading, there are top-grade champions or nags (horses ready for the glue factory). At a horse auction, buyers look for qualities they describe as pretty movers, good disposition, no bad vices, and even flashy. Are humans really so different?

All these horse qualities affect the sales price.

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