Finding New Ground by Robert Chadwick

Author:Robert Chadwick [Chadwick, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781630027131
Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform
Published: 2013-06-09T00:00:00+00:00

—Abraham H. Maslow

When I asked Gayle to facilitate with me, she refused. She looked shocked. I asked her to think about it and make a decision by the afternoon. Not surprisingly, she came to me at the next break and reluctantly agreed to try. “But I’ll be real nervous,” she said.

By the afternoon of the following day, Gayle had facilitated two activities, and I was coaching her for a third.

“After the small groups have recorded their information, then you will have them report to the large group as you did earlier. When they have finished, I want you to provide them an insight on what you learned from that activity that will help the group understand this process.”

“Oh, I could not possibly do that!” Gayle exclaimed. She had a shocked look on her face.

“Because?” I asked.

“I just couldn’t do it; it would be too much. I don’t mind reading off the three-by-five cards, but to speak in the moment? No! I think my mind would just stop when it came time to speak.”

“It would make you feel self-conscious?” I asked.

“Yes, definitely!” she answered.

“Well, let me give you an insight about that. You are a human being. One attribute—and an important one—that separates us from other beings is that we are self-conscious. That is, we know that we exist. And we also know that others exist. And those others have the capacity to be able to judge us.

“Now, if you are not self-conscious, that means that you are nonconscious, not aware of what is going on. It also means that you lose an important attribute of being human. Knowing you, I just don’t believe you would be willing to accept that. So this is your choice: I am going to provide you something you can say that will allow you to be self-conscious and still feel confident.

“This is what I want you to do. When you go to the edge of the circle, pause for a bit and say this to yourself: I am self-conscious and it is OK. I

will trust myself.

“Then it is your choice. If you want to speak with an insight, do that. If not, then turn the group over to me. So, what am I suggesting?”

“You want me to tell myself that I am self-conscious and that it is OK. Then tell myself to trust myself?”

“You got it. Remember, it is your choice.”

When the group had completed the task, Gayle had them read the information from the flip charts. When they were done, there was a pause. She looked at me, then turned back and took a deep breath. Everyone was waiting. She then proceeded to provide an insight that absolutely blew me and everyone in the group away. Her wisdom shifted the group’s perception of the situation they were in. Then she just stopped. I saw her get a frightened look on her face. The whole group waited while she decided what to do.

“I am self-conscious,” she told them. “And it just scares the hell out of me to do this!” Everyone in the group laughed.

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