Declutter Your Mind: How to Stop Worrying, Relieve Anxiety, and Eliminate Negative Thinking (Mindfulness Book Series 1) by Scott S.J. & Davenport Barrie

Author:Scott, S.J. & Davenport, Barrie [Scott, S.J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Oldtown Publishing LLC
Published: 2016-08-20T16:00:00+00:00

It may seem that empathic listening only provides benefits for the speaker, but as the listener you are in a state of focused awareness. When you listen empathically, it’s impossible to be stuck in looping thoughts or distracted by worry or regret.

You can start practicing empathic listening with your partner, family members, and close friends. In your next interaction, commit to 10 minutes of active listening where you are focused solely on the other person and what they are saying. This will bring you closer to your loved one and also give you a break from your cluttered thoughts.

Mindful Speaking

Negative thinking can have a damaging impact on the quality of your relationships. If your language is filled with fearful comments, self-condemnation, disparaging remarks about others, or self-pity, you do nothing more than convince others that you are a negative person to be around.

On other hand, when you focus on fostering positive interactions, you can strengthen the relationships you do have. For instance, Dr. John Gottman discovered through his research that there should be five times as many positive interactions between partners as there are negative in order for a relationship to be stable and a marriage to last . Gottman’s findings can be applied to other relationships as well. Conflict and negativity tend to push people away.

Awareness is always the first step toward change. We recommend paying close attention to what you say during a conversation, particularly in your love relationship. Place a mental filter between your thoughts and words, recognizing the power your words have on one of the most important people in your life.

Resist the temptation to simply react to someone’s words or actions. Take a moment to choose your words carefully. Speak in ways that are loving, compassionate, and respectful, and try to use a calm, non-threatening voice, even if the other person is agitated or angry.

As you speak more mindfully, those around you will often respond in kind. Even if they don’t, you empower yourself to maintain self-control and inner peace.

Through the practice of mindful speaking, you not only improve the quality of your relationships, but also improve the quality of your inner world.

Loving Kindness Meditation

A loving kindness meditation focuses on developing feelings of warmth towards others. You can use a loving kindness meditation specifically to improve your relationships with specific people in your life in order to reduce negative thinking about them.

This kind of meditation cultivates our awareness of others as human beings deserving of compassion and love—even when they are being difficult—which can decrease relationship conflicts and improve your own well-being. There are three studies that support this claim.

First, scientists from Stanford University found that meditation that focuses on loving kindness increases people’s feelings of social connectedness.

Also, according to a University of Utah study , loving kindness meditation practice “decreased overall levels of perceived hostility, insensitivity, interference, and ridicule from others.” This special meditation practice will not only improve your intimate relationships, but your relationship with you as well.

Finally, in a landmark study ,

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