Dating For Dummies by Joy Browne

Dating For Dummies by Joy Browne

Author:Joy Browne [Browne, Joy]
Language: eng
Format: epub, pdf
Tags: Seduction
ISBN: 0470892056
Publisher: John Wiley and Sons Ltd
Published: 2011-01-01T23:00:00+00:00


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Part VI

The Day After

and Beyond

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In this part . . .

Hang on — you’re now launched into that great gray

area between a first date and a relationship. Whoa,

boy. The day after date number one is 24 hours of fantasy, instant replays, post-mortems. It’s a time of wonder . . . as in “I wonder what I should do next?” The day after date

number two is similar but a bit more intense . . . as in

“What’s going to happen now?” No need to fret. I’ll help

you navigate these murky waters.

In this part, you’ll find out how to open up without con-

fessing, how to ask questions without interviewing, how

to listen without nodding off, and how to let your date get to know the real you without scaring the dickens out of

you both. I’ll also give you a few tips on nipping this budding relationship in the bud if things aren’t meant to be.

Yeah, breaking up is hard to do, but not breaking up when you should is much harder on everyone. So buckle up.

Hopefully, you’re in for a long, fun ride.

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Chapter 18

The Next Day

In This Chapter

䊳 Making first impressions — again

䊳 Perking up after an icky date

䊳 Regrouping after a so-so date

䊳 Following up on the perfect date

After a first date is over, there are feelings both men and women share: excitement (if the date went well), disappointment (if it went poorly), and anticipation (if it went well enough to ensure date number two). And that’s about where the similarity ends.

Forgive the sexual stereotypes, but guys really do have a whole different take on the post-date period than women do. The difference is a fantasy thing, a time thing — not a biological thing. It’s a part of our sociology, meaning that guys are socialized differently than girls are. Neither side is right or wrong.

It’s just what is. Therefore, the minutes, hours, days, and weeks after a first date are loaded with the potential for misunderstanding, miscommunication, and mistakes from both sides.

Clearing the air by understanding what’s really going on, from both the male and female points of view, after the first date’s over and before a second one occurs — that’s what this chapter is all about.

Second Thoughts on First Impressions

A date-long first impression is different from the two-second once-over your date gives you when you initially meet. It’s more than a primal, visceral thing.

Throughout the time you spend together, your date’s five senses are working overtime — taking it all in. Processing every nuance, every sigh, every touch.

Even the stuff your date isn’t aware he or she sees, hears, smells, touches, and tastes is seen, heard, touched, smelled, and tasted. Above and beyond 27_768707 ch18.qxp 12/1/05 12:01 AM Page 212

212 Part VI: The Day After and Beyond

the five senses are your date’s sense of style, appropriateness, manners, space, self — you name it. Every part of your date’s past and present being comes into play when evaluating you and how he or she feels about you.



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