Confessions of a Christmas Cookie Pirate by Joseph Truitt

Author:Joseph Truitt
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Joseph Truitt

I’d no sooner closed the door to my bedroom and was about to remove my coat when I heard the sound of a dog barking outside. And I knew that bark like I knew my own thoughts. I rushed over to the window and gazed out onto the front lawn where I spotted Ruffus, surrounded by eight tiny Nutcracker guards. He was barking like mad and looked scared. “What? What is going on?”

As soon as I bolted out of my bedroom, I spotted two more tiny Nutcracker guards coming down the hallway towards me. One of them pointed at me and spoke in a small, sweet voice, “Hey! That’s her! She’s the one I spotted coming out of the boss’s vault.”

The other guard instantly spoke up. “Come on! Let’s get her!”

“Wait, I think there’s been a big misunderstanding…” But the little guards weren’t slowing down, so I took off down the hallway to the main staircase. When I got to the staircase, I climbed onto the handrail and slid down for a faster getaway, but the little guys also hopped the handrail and slid down like lightning. I was able to slow myself with my boots and quickly jumped off the rail and made for the big wooden doors. Unfortunately for the wee little guards, they struggled to get stopped at the bottom. When I opened the door to make a run for it, they both shot off the handrail, slid across the shiny wood floor and right out the door into the snow. So, I hopped over the hapless elves that lay groaning in a pile of snow and headed straight for Ruffus.

He was still barking when I ran out to him, and fortunately for the both of us, the Nutcracker guards had trouble running through the snow. Of course, that didn’t stop them from chasing us. As I ran past the snowman with the creepy moving eyes, I thought it odd that the eyes were now missing, but there was no time to stop and investigate, thanks to the tiny Nutcracker army behind us. By the time Ruffus and I had reached the gate at the end of the drive, the Nutcrackers had hitched up a small Santa sleigh to two Doberman Pincers and were quickly gaining ground. Thankfully, the gate was built more for keeping cars out than it was little girls and dogs, so Ruffus and I slipped through the bars easily and took off down the street with the sound of sleigh bells quickly fading behind us in the dark.

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