Blurry by Lulu Lucille

Author:Lulu Lucille [Lucille, Lulu]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
Published: 2020-12-06T23:00:00+00:00

16

I fiddled around with the tablet on my desk—page after page flipped by. The words weren't even registering; they were just something to occupy the time. The clock's hands pointed to five minutes passed. Mr. Feinstein was at the front of the room. His back toward the students and his hands writing some dribble she'd have to memorize or something. The seat to my right, Lily's seat, remained unoccupied.

Yesterday I avoided her. The only words spoken between us were a handful of greetings offered in the morning and at night. I tried not to worry; I shouldn't be. But the longer the seat remained vacant, the more the anticipation sank in.

The door at the front of the class opened. A familiar face walked in, accompanied and in the arms of Martha. I should have been jealous. That's a sign of affection, wasn't it? That didn't exist, though.

Lily exchanged a smile with Martha and apologized to Mr. Feinstein. I eyed her as she snuck between the row of desks. Every second, that cane of hers rattled against something. The rattles began to get louder. With each step closer, that anomaly in my heart started to grow. I retreated into my tablet.

Something caught my leg. I glanced up and spotted Lily standing still. The cane pressed into my sock more until it stopped.

"Sorry, just wanted to make sure you were there," Lily said. She smiled.

"You're late," I said.

Beside me, Lily sat down. The cane folded, and after a few seconds of searching through her bag, a tablet set against the desk. Lily leaned over toward me.

"What page?" Lily asked.

"Zero clue," I said.

"Don't you pay attention?" Lily asked.

"Not in this class." I said.

Lily leaned into her tablet. A digital voice began to speak softly, just enough for me to hear. It became a distraction. I glanced over at Lily. Instincts told me to do something. Hesitation held me back.

"Why were you late?" I asked.

"I ended up sleeping on the couch," Lily said. "Didn't you notice?"

"No.”

That was a lie. I noticed. It had become hard not to see the empty bed beside me when I woke up. When I found Lily on the couch, I didn't dare wake her.

"Are you mad at me?" Lily asked.

"No," I said.

"Then why didn't you want to hang out yesterday?" Lily asked.

"What?" I asked.

I tried to distract myself from the words on the page. The poetry should have been able to transport me away from this conversation. It didn't. No matter how many oddly spelled words I skimmed past, they didn't drown out Lily's voice.

"You ignored me yesterday. I asked if you wanted to hang out, and you just kind of walked out of the door," Lily said.

Lily pressed a button on her tablet. The soft-spoken digital voice stopped. She waited for an answer. I tapped my fingers against my tablet to find the words Mr. Feinstein talked about.

"I don't remember," I said.

"Did I say something?" Lily asked.

I turned to Lily.

"Just stop talking," I said.

Around us, others became interested in the conversation.

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