Where I Belong by Rachel Ann Nunes

Author:Rachel Ann Nunes [Nunes, Rachel Ann]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Christian Romance, Comtemporary Romance
ISBN: 978-1-939203-27-4
Publisher: White Star Press
Published: 2012-10-14T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twelve

On Sunday after church, Tanner stared at Heather’s e-mail with an overwhelming urge to scream, cry, and break something. She had rejected him! Waves of hurt and despair flooded his entire being. For what seemed like hours, he stared at the screen, seeing the words but unable to read them again.

It was over. Heather hadn’t even given them a chance. He’d been worried about leaving her there alone, and he’d been careful to keep up a continuous dialogue over the e-mail, sharing with her his feelings and his vision of their future. At times her answers had seemed so positive that he felt they were making progress.

All that was over now. She didn’t love him—at least not enough. Certainly not as much as she loved painting.

Without thinking, he reached for his cell phone, pushing the button that would dial his cousin’s number. Savvy had finally moved into her nearby apartment and should be home from church by now.

She answered on the second ring. “Hello?”

He was grateful she’d answered instead of one of her roommates. “Savvy,” he said, barely managing the word.

“Tanner? Is that you? What’s wrong?”

He swallowed hard, trying to speak past the huge lump of pain.

“Tanner?”

“Can you come over?”

“I’ll be right there.”

The phone went dead, and Tanner went to the sitting room to wait. The urge to cry had left; now he only felt a numb emptiness that was almost worse than the previous pain.

Tanner opened the door to Savvy ten minutes later. She rushed in, blue eyes searching his face. “You’re so pale. What happened?”

He led her to the second room in the condo that served as his office. With a tap of his finger, he removed the screen saver and brought up the e-mail. His cousin sat at the desk, scanned Heather’s words rapidly, and then turned to him. “I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t understand,” he said, running a hand through his hair. “Things were coming along well. I thought—oh, Savvy, why does she think it has to be me or her art? I wouldn’t dream of taking that away from her.”

Savvy shook her head. “It’s not you taking it away. It’s the demands of life, of motherhood. You may not see it, but I do. My mother never finished college because she got married. That was fine for her. She’s really happy with her life. But for me—there’s just so much I want to learn and do. I’d hate it if I couldn’t finish my astronomy classes. Unlike you, I don’t want to work at our fathers’ company for the rest of my life.”

“I know. You want to teach.”

“Yes, at a college. That’s the best way for me to keep up on new developments in the field. So I want to do that at least part time while my children are in school. I won’t be able to if I don’t get a degree.”

“But you can do both—learn and have a family. You want to do both, don’t you?” Tanner was feeling confused. Once, gender roles had seemed so easily defined, especially in their religious community.

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