People Games: The Ten Most Common Mind Games and Power Plays That People Play by Liu Min

Author:Liu, Min [Liu, Min]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Power plays, Mind Games, verbal self defense
Published: 2016-02-20T18:30:00+00:00

Game #4: You Owe Me

Description: This mind game or power play is used often by parents on their children as a way of getting what they want out of their children. However, it can also be used among friends or business colleagues by having some “false authority” over the other person.

This power play can also be played by “revisiting the past”, which is something you cannot change, in an attempt to extract long–term loyalty from you even to your own detriment.

Example: In a more extreme example of this, one person asks somebody else who he/she has provided a favor for sometime in the past to do something of dubious legality while reminding the other person of the favor he/she did for them in the past. I’ve been asked (and refused to) do things by distant family members using a vague concept of “family” as some sort of leverage to compel me to provide them assistance.

In a more common example of this power play, parents regularly use guilt or obligation on their children in various ways to manipulate their children to do what they say.

Solution: Give up guilt, obligation, or fear of being seen as selfish as guiding emotions for your life. Instead, do things for another person only when it also benefits you in a win-win type of scenario. As an adult, you should never feel compelled to help someone who uses this power play.

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