Oh No, Newf! by Tui T. Sutherland

Author:Tui T. Sutherland
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Scholastic Inc.
Published: 2014-11-23T16:00:00+00:00

My plan was to go straight over and visit Yeti before I went inside, but when I got home, Dad’s car was just pulling into the driveway, so I couldn’t escape. I glanced at my wrist, and then remembered that I’d lost my watch a couple weeks earlier — probably at the YMCA pool, but really it could have been anywhere. That was maybe the fourth watch I’d lost already this year. I had a feeling Mom wouldn’t be getting me a new one anytime soon, which if you ask me means it’s not really my fault when I’m late all the time.

“Hey kiddo,” Dad said as he popped out of the car.

“Aren’t you home early?” I asked. I glanced over at Avery’s yard, but there was no sign of him or Yeti.

“Nice to see you, too,” he said. “Your mom and I have that party tonight, remember?”

I wrinkled my nose, trying to remember if I’d heard anything about a party. Every Sunday night, Mom and Dad go over the schedule for the week to make sure we all know who has to be at soccer practice or PTA meetings or whatever, but of course I don’t remember it all by Friday night. I mean, that’s days of keeping something in my brain! I have too much other stuff in there!

“Really?” Dad said as we walked my bike into the garage. “You were so excited about Ashley coming over to babysit.”

“Oh,” I said. That did sound familiar. “Something about … art.”

Dad laughed. “Yes, it’s a fund-raising gala at the museum. Your mom’s been planning it for weeks. It’s the opening of the new exhibit for that sculptor Mementa — you may remember her.”

“Oh, yeah. Her work made a big impression on me,” I said, and Dad laughed and laughed. He was still laughing as we came into the kitchen, where Mom was pacing back and forth beside the counter. She was wearing a long shimmery green dress with a pattern of silver feathers that you could only see in the right light. Her hair was down with a little spray of silver feathers pulling it back behind one ear, and she was wearing small emerald earrings and an emerald-and-diamond necklace that matched the color of the dress exactly. She didn’t even look like a mom; she looked like a maharani in an Indian fairy tale.

“Wow,” Dad and I said at the same time.

Mom actually kind of blushed. “Don’t you ‘wow’ me,” she said to Dad. “We’re going to be late! Quick, your tuxedo is up on the bed.” She whapped his shoulder with her little silver purse. “Quit staring and get dressed, you ninny.”

“Ninny,” I giggled as Dad hurried off upstairs. “Mom, you look awesome.”

“Ah-ah, do not hug me with those hands,” Mom said, giving my dirty fingernails a horrified look. “Ashley should be here any minute. We’ve left money for you guys to get pizza. No horror movies this time, OK? Do I need to call her and tell her that?”

“I promise,” I said.

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