Letting Go of Good by Andrea Mathews

Author:Andrea Mathews
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: let go of good, letting go of the good, let go of the good, andrea mathews, andrea matthews, self help, self-help, self help book, self-help book, empowerment, self empowerment, inspiration
Publisher: Llewellyn Worldwide, LTD.
Published: 2017-06-20T04:00:00+00:00

Desire vs. Duty

The good guy does not know what she wants—for to want is to be selfish. She is not even sure who she likes and dislikes—so attuned is she to duty that she doesn’t even ask for emotional contentment. She operates entirely out of guilt-driven obligation. She is definitely involved in other people’s lives to the point of utter exhaustion in some cases. But the involvement is not coming from an authentic core. Rather, it is fear that she will not do the duty good enough, that the person will not like what she’s done, or that something else will go wrong that she’ll have to fix. There is no question asked about when, if, or how she will stop—she simply must keep doing and doing and doing—because that is her duty.

Some will look at these individuals as selfless, thinking their actions are a good thing. These are selfless people who know that sacrifice is necessary for the good of all. They are described as “never thinking of themselves,” “never asking for anything from anyone,” “He will give you the shirt off of his back.” These descriptors are accurate, for the good guy has been taught that to think of self is wrong, to ask for anything is wrong, to hold on to your shirt is wrong.

A person who is selfless is a person with no self—a person who is not conscious of a Self. But how will one know if the service one provides is authentic or not, if one cannot find a place of genuineness within? If all the giving that I do is done from the principle of duty, is there any room to give from the principle of compassion or passion? Would I even recognize compassion if I am so motivated by duty?

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