Geeks, Girls, and Secret Identities by Mike Jung

Author:Mike Jung
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Scholastic Inc.
Published: 2012-09-10T04:00:00+00:00

“Thank you, Ms. Suarez, but I believe I’d like to reveal that tidbit myself,” he said in a slow, deep voice. His fingers kept drumming on the table, THWIDIDIDUMP. THWIDIDIDUMP.

“I am Professor Mayhem.”

Dad dropped the remote control on the carpet with a muffled THUNK.

“Oh no,” he said. “This is NOT possible.”

“What? What is it?”

“It can’t be him.” Dad was clenching his fists. Actually, no, it was more like he was grinding his fingernails into the palms of his hands, and his mouth was open in a toothy snarl. Holy cow. Dad was pissed off!

“WHAT IS IT, DAD?”

Dad held up a finger, waved it around next to his ear like a gun, then pointed at the TV in a jerky motion.

“I know him! I went to high school with that idiot!”

For a second I was confused, because it was like Dad transmogrified into a different version of himself—more slouchy, a little bit of a whinier voice, maybe even shorter? It was bizarre, like he was channeling his inner teenager.

“Professor Mayhem my eye, that’s plain old Dennis Mayhem!” Dad ran his hands through his hair, then laced them behind his neck.

“You know him? Seriously?”

“I haven’t seen that misanthropic pig face in twenty-five years, not since—”

I kinda wanted to know since when, but Dad stopped talking when Professor Mayhem started.

“Greetings, citizens of Copperplate City,” Professor Mayhem said. “So pleased to make your acquaintance.”

The door opened again and a whole crowd of people came in, and not just security guys this time (although there were a few of them too). There was an old lady, a couple of guys in jeans and hoodies, a woman in a lab coat, and … Bobby? Yep, it was Bobby, with two of his cop buddies.

The old lady came and stood next to Dad, and everybody else gathered around the TV as Professor Mayhem went on.

“It appears I have your miserable little city to myself, worms. Unless Captain Stupendous chooses to show his face momentarily?”

Mayhem stuck one hand behind his ear, being all exaggerated about it, and pretended to listen.

“No, it appears not! Excellent. Let’s get down to the meat of it, shall we? By now even a gaggle of simpletons like you all realize I’ve stolen away your superintendent of schools, my old paramour Violet Keller.”

Mom!

“PARAMOUR?” Dad yelled at the TV in such a psychotic voice that I jumped and waved my arms around like Max. “SHE WAS NEVER YOUR PARAMOUR, YOU TROGLODYTE!”

“A charming lass, with whom I’m delighted to renew my relationship.” Professor Mayhem looked like he was having a good time—he grinned, drummed his fingers on the table, and wiggled his dead-caterpillar eyebrows.

“But of course she’s not the only one I’m here to see. Ray-Ray? Are you out there, my old foe? I imagine you’re cowering in some inadequately defended rodent run inside Corwin Towers, eh?”

Huh. Good guess.

“Ray-Ray?” the old lady said. “Oh my stars, Raymond, is that cretin talking to you?”

Dad ground his teeth together.

“It’s a long story, Janet,” he said.

“What a tragic ending

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