Everyday Meditations by Newman John Henry

Author:Newman, John Henry [Newman, John Henry]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sophia Institute Press
Published: 2013-04-11T16:00:00+00:00

25

Jesus, the Light of the Soul

“Stay with us, because it is towards evening” (Luke 24:29).

I adore you, O my God, as the true and only light! From eternity to eternity, before any creature was, when you were alone, alone but not solitary, for you have ever been three in one; you were the infinite light. There was none to see you but yourself. The Father saw that light in the Son, and the Son in the Father. Such as you were in the beginning, such you are now: most separate from all creatures in this your uncreated brightness, most glorious, most beautiful. Your attributes are so many separate and resplendent colors, each as perfect in its own purity and grace as if it were the sole and highest perfection.

Nothing created is more than the very shadow of you. Bright as are the angels, they are poor and most unworthy shadows of you. They pale and look dim and gather blackness before you. They are so feeble beside you that they are unable to gaze upon you. The highest seraphim veil their eyes, by deed as well as by word proclaiming your unutterable glory. For me, I cannot even look upon the sun, and what is this but a base material emblem of you? How should I endure to look on even an angel? And how could I look upon you and live? If I were placed in the illumination of your countenance, I would shrink up like the grass. O most gracious God, who shall approach you, being so glorious, yet how can I keep from you?

How can I keep from you? For you, who are the light of angels, are the only light of my soul. You enlighten every man that cometh into this world. I am utterly dark, as dark as hell, without you. I droop and shrink when you are away. I revive only in proportion as you dawn upon me. You come and go at your will. O my God, I cannot keep you! I can only beg of you to stay. Mane nobiscum, Domine, quoniam advesperascit (Luke 24:29). Remain until morning, and then go not without giving me a blessing. Remain with me till death in this dark valley, when the darkness will end. Remain, O light of my soul, jam advesperascit! The gloom, which is not yours, falls over me. I am nothing. I have little command of myself. I cannot do what I would. I am disconsolate and sad. I want something; I know not what. It is you that I want, though I so little understand this. I say it and take it on faith; I partially understand it, but very poorly. Shine on me “O fire ever burning and never failing,” and I shall begin, through and in your light, to see light and to recognize you truly, as the source of light. Mane nobiscum. Stay, sweet Jesus; stay forever. In this decay of nature, give more grace.

Stay with me, and then I shall begin to shine as you shine: so to shine as to be a light to others.

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