Book of Shadows 4: In Memoriam by Michael Beaulieu

Author:Michael Beaulieu [Beaulieu, Michael]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Michael Midnight Publishing
Published: 2018-09-18T00:00:00+00:00

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CHAPTER TWENTY SIX

LIA

I’m sitting on the living room couch with my mother. I talked her into letting me have a glass of wine tonight. She poured me one from a bottle of red from Spain she’d just opened. We’re watching that show Scientology and the Aftermath, which is pretty disturbing.

“I don’t understand how they’re still able to recruit people when anyone can go online and read about their secrets,” Mom says.

“Beats the hell out of me,” I say. “I don’t know how anyone ever trusted the religion in the first place when the guy who created it was a sci-fi writer. You’d think that would’ve made people weary.”

Mom nods. “Yeah. What I don’t understand is how they’re considered a religion when they don’t worship anyone. You never hear about them so much as praying to anything.”

“I guess they worship the guy who created it.”

“From what I’ve seen on this show, it sounds like they basically worship that guy who runs it now. David Miscarriage.”

I erupt with laughter. “Miscarriage?”

“Whatever his name is. You know what I mean.”

I laugh for a few more seconds and take a sip of my wine as we continue watching. I’ve drank half the glass already and it’s calming me down, just as I’d hoped it would. I was just a little on edge tonight. People think I’m so calm, cool and collected, but I’m often screaming inside. Sometimes it just feels like my thoughts are racing from one side of my brain to the other so hard and fast they’re going to burst through my skull. Tonight, I’m just antsy.

I keep thinking about my conversation with Shar before we had sex this afternoon. Wondering if she’s crushing on Emma. When we first got together, she was really hoping that Emma would join us. I guess that would’ve been cool, but whenever she’d bring it up I’d feel like I was her second choice. I suppose that’s how I’m feeling tonight. I don’t doubt that she’s my soulmate or that she loves me. But maybe she has romantic feelings for Emma, too? Like how January loves Pete but she’s crushing on Emma. She didn’t encourage January to pursue her, but maybe she wants her to? Because if they ever break up then there would be a chance Emma might finally want to be a threesome or thruple – or whatever they’re calling it this week – with us. I don’t know what I’d do if that happened. I look at Emma as my sister, which would make being with her feel weird. Almost gross. I suppose I might get used to it, but I’d prefer not to. I like Shar and I just being a regular couple. I don’t want to have to share her with anyone. That’s partially why this afternoon’s talk is lingering in my mind. I fear that Emma is occupying part of her heart and I want it to be all mine.

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