30 Days to Better Thinking and Better Living Through Critical Thinking: A Guide for Improving Every Aspect of Your Life, Revised and Expanded by Elder Linda & Paul Richard

Author:Elder, Linda & Paul, Richard [Elder, Linda]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Publisher: Pearson Education
Published: 2012-09-20T16:00:00+00:00

Strategies for avoiding irrational submission

• Pinpoint underdog behavior in yourself by identifying situations in which you tend to go along with others without good reason. In these situations, you might resent the subservient role you play. Yet your resentment is submerged. You don’t explicitly resist. You say what you are expected to say (but don’t really mean). After going along, you blame others for your frustration.

To what extent do you find yourself behaving in a subservient way in your everyday life? Why are you doing it? What are you getting for doing it? What do you think would happen if you spoke up and said what you really think? What do you think you would lose?

• Identify specific circumstances in the past in which you behaved in a submissive manner. Did you feel resentful? Defensive? Irritable? Intimidated?

• Much submissiveness in society goes unnoticed, and most people are egocentrically submissive in some areas of their lives. For example, most people do not recognize their submission to their peer group, to irrational cultural requirements and taboos, or to socially defined authorities (people with high social status) who might lead people to act against their interests. Determine how important it is to be your own person, to think for yourself, and to be in command of your life. Insisting you are free does not make you free. Freedom begins with recognizing the extent of your slavery and subservience to social conventions, rules, and ideology.

• Realize that the submitter, like the dominator, can be either successful or unsuccessful. To the extent that you egocentrically submit to others, how “successful” are you? Do you tend to get what you want through submission? What precisely are you getting? What price are you paying for the reward? To what extent are you being dishonest in the situation—either with yourself or others?

• Catch yourself being submissive, such as in a meeting or in a conversation. At that moment, speak up. Say, as rationally as possible, precisely what you think. Notice the sense of self you gain.

• Take a global look at your behavior to determine the extent to which you are dominating, submissive, or rational. In what areas of your life do you tend to dominate? In what areas do you tend to submit? In what areas are you rational? What percentage of the time are you dominating, submissive, or reasonable? Start observing yourself closely to take control of yourself. When you do, you might be surprised by the inner sense of integrity you gain.

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