The Schnoz of Doom by Andrea Beaty

Author:Andrea Beaty
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Abrams
Published: 2015-01-19T05:00:00+00:00

Kevin’s classmates stopped their push-ups and sit-ups and counted his attempts to grasp the bar as he zoomed past . . . Twelve! . . . Thirteen! . . . Fourteen! . . .

When suddenly . . .

BAM!

A loud noise echoed through the halls of the school. The crowd of students watching Kevin, including Joules, ran into the hall to see what was going on.

Joules looked down the hall and saw a tall, unfamiliar woman dressed in purple. The woman had blond hair, square glasses, and a very large nose. The woman pushed her way through the excited crowd of students, turned the corner, and disappeared.

“Waiiiiaaaaiiiiiaaaaiiiiitttttt!” Kevin yelled.

Joules did not wait. She elbowed her way into the crowd and—

CRASH!

The students surged toward the noises, sweeping Joules along in their current to the biology room. They rounded the corner and stopped. The hallway outside Mr. H’s classroom was littered with broken chair bits. The group pushed into the room, which looked as if a tornado had ripped through it. Chairs were knocked over; textbooks and broken glassware littered the floor. Next to Mr. H’s desk sat the remains of two empty metal cages, which had been blown to shreds.

“Stand back!” yelled Mr. Shhh, jumping in front of Joules. “This is a job for someone with arms like these!”

He pumped first one bicep, then the other. The students applauded.

“They are impressive, aren’t they?” said Mr. Shhh, making his biceps pop up and down. “Wow! This is a mess. Whoever did that had some very impressive arms indeed. They must use the Noodle-Armor!”

He struck a new pose and the students applauded again.

Joules knelt beside the destroyed cages and picked up a clump of greasy gray fur that smelled like the gunk at the bottom of her fish tank after a long vacation. A very long vacation. Mr. Shhh was wrong. The force that had torn the metal cages to shreds did not come from someone who used the Noodle-Armor. It had not come from a person at all. She picked up one of the curved metal fragments strewn across the floor. They had been blown apart by the force of the monsters inside them. Monsters that were now gone. A sick feeling hit Joules as she looked around the room and realized something much worse: Mr. H was gone, too.

Joules looked for Kevin among the students who stood applauding Mr. Shhh’s biceps poses. He wasn’t there. Joules ran back to the gym, where she expected to find Kevin suspended in the Noodle-Armor, yelling for help. Instead, she found a silent gym. The only sign that Kevin had been there was a shredded heap of nylon and Velcro that lay on the floor.

Joules scraped her fingernail over the Velcro and pulled away a wad of—you guessed it—fur. Greasy gray fur.

She stood up and looked around the empty gym.

“Kevin!” she yelled.

No answer.

She walked to the bleachers, unzipped her backpack, and pulled out a large spray bottle of splurp. She rezipped the compartment and tossed her backpack and Kevin’s under the bleachers.

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