The M Pages by Colette Bryce

Author:Colette Bryce
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Pan Macmillan UK

8.

A phrase on the radio: avoiding the overwhelm.

A month’s mind. Nothing doing here.

What happens to the selfhood after death?

A naïve question. Is there even an ‘after’?

Is death an illusion? Is ‘life’ extinguished?

Or does it go on, the soul and all of that?

Hey, where exactly does a person go?

Hello? Look here, we could use some answers.

Hilary Mantel once wrote of seeing ghosts,

of portals through to a post-death zone.

Beyond Black: a motorway medium

flanked by a cynical sidekick, Colette.

The mind fills up with Victorian charlatans

cashing in on the vulnerable bereaved:

mechanical doorbells hooked up to a wire.

A ouija board. Knock knock. Who’s there?

Yet . . . I’d love to imagine some semblance

of joy, in some other realm, for M.

A self-serving thought. Her own thoughts,

brief in a notebook, branded ‘Paper Blanks’:

It isn’t as if

I have anyone to answer to

I live on my own

I am not beaten yet

I am paying respect to my past

which over the last

three years has been

drink drink drink

I will hang on

to this sobriety for dear life

It is very much living in the day

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