The Imperfect Marriage by Darryl Strawberry & Tracy Strawberry

Author:Darryl Strawberry & Tracy Strawberry
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Howard Books
Published: 2014-08-05T00:00:00+00:00

TRUST IS A TWO-WAY STREET

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When you work on rebuilding your marriage, you have to work with each other to prove your integrity and character. That’s right, with. Both spouses have to do the work.

You have to get to the root of the betrayal or trust issue. Why did your husband cheat? Why did your wife start drinking? Why did your spouse gamble your assets on a risky investment? Whatever the offense is, you must go deeper than the offense itself. Get down to the why.

It’s a time for both parties to reflect. We know this can be tough. If your husband had an affair or your wife suffers from an addiction, it’s tempting to point out their issues to the exclusion of your own. But you have to include yourself in this journey for it to work.

Reconnecting after a betrayal is not a time for one spouse to judge or crucify the other. It’s a time to take your eyes off your spouse and allow God to reveal whether you have contributed to the problem.

Set the actual offense aside for a moment and ask yourself some questions:

Do I shut out my husband?

Do I shut out my wife?

Do I withhold sex?

Do I talk behind my spouse’s back?

Am I so deeply preoccupied by the kids, the house, my career, my hobbies, my girls’ night, my boys’ night, my workout, my job, that I’ve neglected my relationship?

We are not saying that whatever your spouse did is your fault. Reflecting on your behavior or your way of relating does not excuse your spouse’s betrayal. Nor does it mean you should take ownership of your spouse’s mistake or failure. We are simply stressing the importance of self-reflection. Embrace this crossroads in your marriage as an opportunity to take a good hard look at your part in the relationship as a whole.

Self-examination in the prayer closet will take you into the core of your heart. When you and your spouse dig deep within yourselves, the process of rebuilding trust can begin. And the remedy will present itself.

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