The 'I' in Agile - A Personal Journey by Iyer Hema

Author:Iyer, Hema [Iyer, Hema]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: ITSM Press
Published: 2018-10-24T16:00:00+00:00

Making decisions became easier as my self-esteem improved. The noise around me gradually stopped bothering me as I focussed on what needed to be done.

Making myself heard

Alice waited till the eyes appeared, and then nodded. “It’s no use speaking to it,” she thought, “till its ears have come, or at least one of them.” In another minute the whole head appeared, and then Alice put down her flamingo, and began an account of the game, feeling very glad she had someone to listen to her.

― Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

We had many meetings to discuss and debate how we were going to develop the product. There were always some people who had very strong opinions while others wanted to be seen as having some opinion about the subject.

As an introverted person, I needed time to consume ideas and concepts before I came up with my own. I was not short of opinions, ideas or even confidence; it was just that on some occasions, by the time I formulated my thoughts, the moment would pass. On other occasions, I would be talked over by the stronger and louder voices. I felt like I was being ignored.

Strangely enough, I found the solution to my problem from my 5-year-old son. At dinner time, my daughter is usually full of stories about what happened in school that day. She won’t let anyone else talk. My son usually has many questions to ask about her friends or wants to add in stories of his own, but would never get a chance to, as my daughter would talk over him. This would really wind him up and dinner would always end up in a fight between them.

I then noticed that my son started to raise his hand. I asked him why he was doing that and he said that his teacher had said that if you wanted a turn to say something or ask a question in class, you should raise your hand. That was good manners. And without any intervention from us, my daughter started to notice his raised hand and would stop talking and ask him what he had to say. He was happy as he was being included in the conversation. And we were happy that the fighting during dinner stopped.

To be heard and to feel included is such a basic human craving. It does not matter whether you are at work, at school or at home.

Having found the solution, I started to prepare for meetings and workshops in advance, so I had my thoughts and questions written down. When there was no clear agenda to a meeting, I asked the organiser what the meeting was about so that I was able to prepare beforehand. I started to script my lines in advance for various what-if scenarios.

In the meeting, if I wasn’t getting a chance to speak, I raised my hand to get attention. Invariably, someone would notice and give me a turn to speak. I started to grab the moment to have my say.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.