The Franchise Babe by Dan Jenkins

Author:Dan Jenkins [Jenkins, Dan]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Humour, Women golfers, Humorous, Sportswriters, General, Fiction, Midlife crisis, Middle-aged men, Sports, Golf stories
ISBN: 9780767925280
Google: OgPhswhczo0C
Amazon: 0767925289
Goodreads: 6882117
Publisher: Anchor
Published: 2008-06-03T05:00:00+00:00

Though I hadn’t formally met Jan and Linda Merle, they pretended to know me and said they were aware I’d been at the Firm Chick last week, and they understood I was working on a story about Ginger Clayton.

Linda Merle’s hair was down, she wore a dress and heels, and she could have passed for a PTA mother. Jan was in slacks, shirt, blazer, and her hair was cut short, the kind of style that makes women look like they go to my barbershop.

“Ginger is the next great player,” Jan Dunn said. “I don’t say this because Thurlene is standing here. Ginger has it all.”

Linda Merle Draper said, “She can’t be anything but good for our tour…with her combination of looks and talent.”

Jan Dunn said, “What do you know about our tour, Mr. Brannon, if anything? Aside from the fact that Ginger Clayton is a dish?”

“I’m no big authority on it,” I said, “but I covered Annika at Colonial and found myself rooting for her to do good. I know something about your history…who your immortals are. I know Patty Berg won fifteen majors…Mickey Wright won thirteen including four U.S. Opens…Babe Zaharias and Louise Suggs both won ten majors…so has Annika. Betsy Rawls won eight, and she’s the only other player with four U.S. Opens. Juli Inkster and Karrie Webb have seven…Kathy Whitworth has six. You two have four each. Jan, you’ve won two Dinah Shores, or I should say Nabiscos, and two LPGAs. Linda Merle, if I’m not mistaken, you have an Open, a Dinah-Nabisco, and two LPGA championships.”

Jan smiled. “You can stay in the room, Jack.”

I said, “I think you people ought to right the wrongs of history…give Mickey Wright fourteen and Kathy Whitworth seven. They both won the Dinah before it was a major, but it soon was.”

“I’ll go with that,” Jan said.

“Oh, my goodness!” Linda Merle said. “You people haven’t met Francois! Thurlene Clayton, Jack Brannon…this is our distinguished visitor—Francois D’Auby La Foo.”

That’s what I thought I heard. His actual name was Francois D’Aubigne Lagoutte.

He didn’t offer a handshake.

Jan Dunn said, “Francois is from Paris.”

“Bordeaux,” he said.

“That’s right, Bordeaux,” Jan said. “Which part?”

“All,” he said.

Linda Merle said, “I hope Francois doesn’t mind me saying that Forbes magazine lists him as one of the ten richest men in the world.”

“Cinq,” Francois said flatly. Another correction.

“Boy, top five now!” Linda Merle said. “We’re moving up. How about that, folks?”

Thurlene smiled. I tried.

Jan said, “Francois came here in his private plane from his home in France.”

“Many homes,” Francois said.

I wondered if he was making a joke.

Jan said, “He has many homes in France. You have a Citation jet, don’t you?”

“The Citation Deece.”

Linda Merle said, “Francois came all the way here for the bombshell Marsha is going to drop tonight—and tomorrow at her press conference.”

“Bombshell?” I said. “I’m into bombshells.”

“You’re getting a sneak preview tonight after dinner.”

“But it’s a bombshell? You promise?”

“I’ll say!”

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