Teens Can Make it Happen by Stedman Graham

Author:Stedman Graham
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2000-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

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Many teenagers fear criticism because they place so much emphasis on being accepted. We all want to be liked. We all want to please other people. The problem is maintaining a balance between controlling our own lives and winning the acceptance and approval of the people we care about.

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I wish they taught classes in this in junior high to prepare people. It takes courage to face criticism or rejection from your peers, and it is so easy to ignore your own conscience and good judgment when others are pressuring you to go along to get along. Peer pressure and the desire to be accepted can often end with traumatic results. In Florida not long ago, a group of teenagers went on a criminal rampage that began with vandalism but ended with them murdering a high school band instructor. The teens were mostly good students who had given up their own good judgment to follow a classmate who had become their leader.

It’s a frightening thing, and not uncommon, for one person with bad intentions to corrupt others into following him. Often, it begins when someone is afraid to face criticism from a friend or acquaintance. You have to have faith in your own judgment and in your own value as a person in these—and in all—circumstances.

I have a friend who was rejected by the in crowd in high school because he refused to go along with things that they were doing. He took a lot of heat over it, but a few years later a girl he had gone to school with told him how much she had come to admire him for standing up for what he thought was right. Needless to say, my friend has done well in this world because of his faith in his own judgment and his ability to take a stand when necessary. On the other hand, those young people in Florida have done things that they and their loved ones will have to pay for probably for the rest of their lives.

It is also true in relationships that some people are so eager to please and to be loved that they give away too much of themselves. They let the other person dominate them, even hurt them physically because they are to eager to have a relationship and feel loves. It is often difficult to find the middle road in these situations, particularly for someone who has not been grounded in a loving and secure family life at home. But it is vital to protect yourself in these situations so that you are not taken advantage of. You have value. You deserve to be respected. No one has the right to abuse you mentally or physically. Chances are better that no one will if you take steps to take control of your life. We’ll talk about doing that after the next worksheet. Many teenagers fear criticism because they place so much emphasis on being accepted. We all want to be liked.

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