Tales from the Crib by Green Risa
Author:Green, Risa
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: PENGUIN group
Published: 2010-03-01T00:00:00+00:00
fourteen
Two days later, Iâm sitting on the floor in Susanâs class, surveying the room to see if any of the other babies have freakish physical deformities, or if mine is the only one. I think that mine is the only one. Some of the babies are completely bald, but that doesnât really count. One has a colossal noseâweâre talking a serious beakâand one poor little girl is just downright ugly, but thatâs not what Iâm looking for, either.
No, I think, trying not to cry as I realize that all of the other babies are perfectly normal. Thereâs nobody else. Eleven perfectly normal, skinny little beanpoles with perfectly normal round bowling balls for heads, and one gigantic round bowling ball topped with the head of a tennis racket. God, I wonder if formula causes flathead syndrome, too.
I sigh. Ever since the appointment with Dr. Newman, Iâve been obsessed with fixing Parkerâs head. I went out and bought a little pillow with a hole in the middle of itâit looks like the part of a massage table that you stick your face in, except that itâs for the back of her head, for when sheâs lying on the floorâand Iâve instructed Deloris to try to keep her on her stomach as much as possible, even though she hates being on her stomach and screams bloody murder whenever I make her do âtummy time.â
But her sleeping is turning out to be a real problem. Iâve been putting her down on her side, like Dr. Newman said, but she always rolls onto her back within twenty seconds. The first night I kept running into her room every five minutes to push her back onto her side, but thatâs obviously not a long-term solution. So I called Dr. Newman yesterday to tell him that it wasnât working, and he recommended using crib wedges to keep her in place. So I ran out and bought two different kinds, but they donât work either. She slides right over the damn things.
I swear, you have no idea how much this is stressing me out. I mean, how am I supposed to trust him that her head is going to get better if the solutions heâs giving me donât work? Trust him, my ass. I wonder if Susan has any ideas. I think Iâll ask her at the end of class, during the Q & A time.
The lecture today is about language development, and Susan has provided us with a long list of books that we should be reading them at this age. Iâm not really paying attention because Iâm so consumed with comparing Parkerâs head to everyone elseâs, but Iâm pretty sure I just heard her say that we should be reading to them for an hour a day. Which is absurd, by the way. I mean, I donât know when the last time was that she tried reading a book to a three-month-old, but itâs pointless. I tried to read Pat the Bunny to Parker just last week, but all she wanted to do was gum the pages.
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