Stupid about Men by Deborah Dunn

Author:Deborah Dunn
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Published: 2013-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

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CHAPTER 6

The Gold-Spinning Maiden

The Girl Who Spun Tales

This story is so delicious—chock-full of symbols, metaphors, and meanings related to women and the secrets they keep to protect themselves and others. In this case, the girl’s father tells a bald-faced lie that results in his daughter being locked away in a tower. And like good little girls are sometimes trained to do, she tries—and lies—to protect him.

The remainder of the tale describes a deal the young maiden strikes with a demonic little man who pops up out of the floorboards while she lies on the straw bemoaning her fate. He promises to spin the straw into gold for her if she will give him her firstborn. She agrees, fools the king, and he marries her, believing she can truly spin gold. She assumes her problems are over.

But years later, when her first child arrives, sure enough, the creature returns. The queen cries for mercy, and with relish he concocts a game whereby she must tell him his true name, which is Rumpelstiltskin. With the help of her huntsmen, who hear Rump dancing in the forest and, like an idiot, singing his own name, she discovers his true identity. Screaming foul epitaphs, the enraged little demon drops back down through the floorboards, never to be seen again.

Of course, because it’s a fairy tale, from that point on the queen lives happily ever after. The story nonetheless serves as a great illustration of the mistakes we make when we keep secrets and lie so that we can protect our loved ones and ourselves. And in the maiden’s case, she not only lied to protect herself and her father, but also to rise in social status.

But secrets and lies can gain a terrible power over us, if we let them, and they can be especially toxic to our relationships with men. That’s why we need this sixth right-romance rule:

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