Startup Life: Surviving and Thriving in a Relationship with an Entrepreneur by Brad Feld & Amy Batchelor

Author:Brad Feld & Amy Batchelor [Feld, Brad]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Publisher: Wiley
Published: 2013-01-06T14:00:00+00:00

WHAT COMPATIBILITY REALLY MEANS

When you’re trying to live with someone who is different than you, it can be the little daily things that wear on you over time. Are you a night owl or an early bird? Do you listen to music throughout the day, or do you need silence when you work? Vegetarian or paleo-carnivore? Morning news on television or NPR or no news at all? Coffee or tea? Smoker or non? (Egads.) Cats or dogs? The list of differences is extensive, and you and your partner will need to figure out what things matter to you and what you can either let go of or take turns having what you want. It can be hard to compromise when the choice is between listening to Mozart or listening to N.W.A. and the Posse. (Try headphones.)

Compatibility doesn’t mean you need to be identical twins to live happily together. Compatibility really means respect: respecting your partner’s differences, acknowledging that she might have different ideas about a morning routine, or how important cloth napkins are when entertaining, or how many shoes are enough. We believe that striving for an environment of fairness and taking turns can smooth out some of these differences; but some of the minor irritants of daily life can become precipitating events for big fights or serve as stand-ins for deeper, unaddressed conflicts. Try to communicate clearly about when you think it’s your turn to choose the music or whether you have a deeper values conflict about money and shoe budgets. Try different modalities and talk about what works and what doesn’t. Keep the air clear and don’t let irritation become the dominant pattern in your daily routines.

The cliché “opposites attract” is one that you often see played out in real life between partners in an entrepreneurial couple. Here’s an example from two newlyweds, Sarah and Bart Lorang, CEO of FullContact.

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