So Worth Loving by Eryn Eddy

Author:Eryn Eddy
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Christian Living/Women;God (Christianity)—Love;Self-esteem—Religious aspects—Christianity;Love—Religious aspects—Christianity;REL012040;REL012130;REL012120
ISBN: 9781493428786
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
Published: 2020-12-04T00:00:00+00:00

Intimacy

in·ti·ma·cy | \ˈin-tə-mə-sē
something of a personal or private nature; nearness, closeness

We all desire intimacy. We all want closeness. We all want to be near something or someone that makes us feel seen, loved, known, and heard. As people, our ultimate source of intimacy is found in our Creator. But too often we try to plug the holes in our heart with other things that make us feel temporarily seen, loved, known, and heard.

We are always just degrees away from building intimacy with God. He’s always near and he’s always willing, but many of us tell ourselves that he doesn’t care or want to know us. I told myself there are bigger and worse cases than mine for him to tend to in this world. So, instead of bothering him with my stuff, I went on a search for someone else who cared to know me and wanted to know me.

I attempted to plug the holes in my heart with relationship after relationship. It worked for a little while, but it wasn’t real intimacy. And the truth is, I was tired of it.

Are you as tired as I was? Are you jaded and worn out? Have you made decisions you thought would help you gain intimacy and remedy your pain but ended up making things worse, like I did? Well, I hope this is good news for the ones about to throw in the towel . . . God does not toss us away if we aren’t perfect. We don’t need to arrive at a certain point to be loved by him. He will lean in when we are willing to let him in. God wants to show us we don’t have to be perfect to be seen and known. Our broken circumstances are used to create a level of empathy in us that more people need to encounter.

One person who helped me see that was my friend Joe. He has witnessed my entire journey, from the unraveling to the restoration. At each step, he encouraged me in a healthy direction while accepting where I was. Conversations with Joe always ended with “I love you. I believe in you.”

One day, Joe called me and asked if I was dating anyone and I said yes.

“Well, who is it?” Joe asked.

I replied, “Jesus.” I could hear Joe’s eyes roll over the phone.

“Eryn . . . no thirty-two-year-old says they are dating Jesus; that’s what you say when you’re twenty-two years old.”

“Well, Joe, I was married at twenty-two, and that didn’t work out, so I’m trying it now.”

We both laughed because it seemed funny, but it was exactly what I needed.

For a long time, friends had told me I should take a break from dating. That I needed to learn to love “just me.” But I rolled my eyes at their advice and avoided all the books that encouraged taking a break from dating. I thought they were cheesy or insignificant, but the truth is, they were right. Dating without a break led me nowhere but to more heartache.

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