Now and Then by Lisa Henry

Author:Lisa Henry [Henry, Lisa]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2022-01-03T00:00:00+00:00

5

Now

I hate Zach, but my fingers are twisting in his hair so that he can’t escape this kiss. Not that he’s showing any signs he wants to go—he’s crowding me up against the wall still, one hand planted beside my head, and one gripping the front of my faded chambray shirt. His knee is wedged between my legs, so that if I try to buck him off, I’ll just be humping his thigh, and doesn’t that thought send a jolt of heat spiking through me?

I hate him, but I’m still pulling him closer, and denim rasps against denim.

“Fuck you,” I tell him and nip at his bottom lip.

He pulls away, grinning. “You want to bite me, Owen? I could be into that.”

“I want to punch you in the fucking face.” But I settle for another kiss, too many teeth involved to mistake it as anything sweet. I tug on his hair to hear him grunt, and he pushes his knee harder between my thighs. My dick is hard and aching, and fuck my dad’s insistence that you should always tuck your shirt in because it’s only gonna take one look down for Zach to know exactly what he’s doing to me.

And I’m a fucking idiot. As if he needs to see my hard-on for that. I’d hardly be kissing him if I wasn’t into it, would I?

But nothing about this makes sense. I hate him, but he’s mine to hate. He owes me that, doesn’t he? If we can’t be best mates like we were because he destroyed it, we can at least have this. I can at least hate him in a way that belongs to just us.

Our first kiss ruined my life. I want this one to ruin him.

Jesus, but it’s hard to tell who’s winning here because he shifts, and then both his hands are on my hips, fingers tightening, and my head thumps back against the wall—the picture frame rattles—and the scrape of his teeth on my neck almost makes me come in my jeans. He pulls back, eyes wide, pupils almost swallowing his irises, and for a moment all we can do is stare at each other, panting. It feels like we’re balanced on a knife’s edge here. Feels like it could go either way. I could easily push him away now that that first mad clash of teeth and tongues, violent and hot, is over with, but I don’t. Fuck him, but I don’t.

I might hate Zach Baldwin the rock star, but those grey eyes, flecked with brown, are the same ones that stared into mine on our first day of year one, when I handed him my spare HB pencil and he gave me a gap-toothed grin in return. That day it felt like something in the invisible machinery of the universe clicked into place. I might have hated him for ten years, but for the ten years before that he was my whole world, and I was his. Like brothers, everyone said, but we were more than brothers.

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