Moscow Stations by Venedikt Yerofeev & Stephen Mulrine

Author:Venedikt Yerofeev & Stephen Mulrine [Yerofeev, Venedikt; Mulrine, Stephen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 0571192041
Publisher: Faber and Faber
Published: 1998-01-18T16:00:00+00:00

Fryazevo to Kilometre 61

‘Okay, here’s to Privy Councillor Johann von Goethe!’

Well, the minute I downed that one I could feel I was getting seriously guttered, and so were all the rest.

‘Er... d’you mind if I ask a silly question?’

Black Moustache spoke through his moustache, and through the sandwich he had in it. Again, he addressed himself exclusively to me.

‘You don’t mind if I ask: why’ve you so much sorrow in your eyes? I mean, with so much knowledge, how can you be so miserable? Anybody’d think you hadn’t wet your whistle since morning!’

I got a bit annoyed at this.

‘What d’you mean? D’you really think this is sorrow? My eyes are just bleary, that’s all. I’m just slightly pissed...’

‘No, no — bleary-eyed, maybe, but that’s from sorrow! You’re like Goethe. By your entire appearance you refute one of my theories, which may be somewhat speculative, but derives from experience nonetheless. Yes, you’re like Goethe, you refute everything.’

‘How? Because I’m bleary-eyed?’

‘Exactly! You’re bleary-eyed! Now listen and I’ll tell you my cherished theory, my lemma: if we drink at night, and don’t drink in the morning, what are we like at night, and what do we become in the morning? For instance, if I have a drink I get fantastically happy, I’m full of life, really outrageous, I can’t sit still. But in the morning, well, in the morning I’m not just unhappy, not just sluggish, no. I’m gloomier than my normal, sober self, by precisely the same amount as I was happier than it the night before. And if I was in the grip of Eros, so to speak, then my disgust in the morning is in direct proportion to last night’s desire. D’you know what I mean? Here, look...’

Black Moustache sketched out his bullshit lemma on a piece of paper:

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