Keep Showing Up by Karen Ehman

Author:Karen Ehman
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Zondervan
Published: 2019-01-18T16:00:00+00:00

So, when we look at these words for love side by side, what can we conclude? I think it looks something like this:

Phileo affection is a growing fondness between two friends that typically develops gradually. It cannot be commanded because it’s tied to feelings toward another person, but it can develop over time in a relationship. However, given that phileo love gives because it receives, it’s conditional.

Storge love is natural; it happens intrinsically. And sometimes, we do love others—especially family members—out of a sense of obligation because we feel it’s the right thing to do.

Eros love certainly occurs in life. In most folks, pretty frequently. No planning required! However, we must realize that, for the most part, it’s unsustainable. Furthermore, this intense attraction can often morph, becoming debilitating hatred later on. Haven’t we all known people who were once in love and married, but who today voice their intense dislike—even hatred—of the same man or woman who is now their former spouse?

And one more important observation: even though this feelings-driven eros love is not always wrong, we are never commanded in the Bible to have this type of love.

Agape is where it’s at, people! The supernatural love that originates with God. The kind of love that’s a choice. That loves despite, not because of. That isn’t tied to our emotions as phileo is but is rooted in our wills, as we make up our minds to display such sacrificial love to one another. Agape is the type of love described in what has come to be known as the “Love Chapter” of the Bible—1 Corinthians 13.

Agape love is an action—not a feeling—that endeavors to display to another human being the unconditional love of God.

If we were to look back at the passages from 1 John that I mentioned earlier and investigate which Greek word for love was used, we would see that God is commanding us to display agape, unreserved love toward other people. Yes, even people of the spousal sort. This unconditional love shouldn’t scare us. If God commands us to display it, he will enable us to do it! And remember, this love comes from God himself (1 John 4:7). It isn’t something we have to try to muster up from within ourselves. God will give it to us, so we can in turn display it to our spouse.

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