Graduating From Guilt by Holly Michelle Eckert

Author:Holly Michelle Eckert
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: PuddleDancer Press
Published: 2019-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

Step 6: Check In and Make a Request

“Rebecca, it sounds like you have already graduated from your guilt. Would you like to complete step 6 to see if there is anything additional that you’d like to ask of yourself?” I inquired.

“I feel much lighter already, but let’s go ahead,” she replied.

OBSERVATIONS: “When I recall feeling guilty for being so wasteful …”

FEELINGS: “I feel amused …”

NEEDS: “because I now have appreciation for all the contributions I do make.”

Rebecca was stumped on the request part of the model. “What request can there possibly be?” she wondered.

I asked her if she thought that she might ever fall into guilt and judgment of herself again. “Oh yes. But only about ten times a day,” she said with a smile.

“What if we make a request that will help you live in the place you want to be when that guilt comes knocking at your door again?” I suggested. “You could make yourself a little card to keep in your pocket with your pure intention. Perhaps it might say something like ‘I contribute in balance.’ Then whenever you need a reminder of your deepest intentions, you could pull it out and remind yourself. Can you think of a phrase you’d like to use to remind yourself?”

“I get your drift,” Rebecca replied. “Here’s my request—

REQUESTS: “I’d like to request that I write ‘Name three contributions you’ve made today’ on my pocket card. That will get me out of self-judgment and into self-appreciation. Then I can make a decision out of gratitude rather than fear.”

“You have just stumbled upon one of the most life-enhancing benefits of Nonviolent Communication,” I affirmed. “Rather than taking action out of fear of rejection or punishment, even punishment that comes from yourself, you can take action through your values and intentions by connecting with your needs. In this case, instead of acting from a place of judgment, you are acting from a place of balance and contribution, and it is clear that you feel the difference.”

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.