Gone Too Far! by Bola Agbaje

Author:Bola Agbaje
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781408141311
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
Published: 2019-11-23T00:00:00+00:00

Scene Seven

It is early evening, and Yemi and Ikudayisi are still out on the estate. They have finally got the milk and are heading home. They have been to a chicken-and-chips shop, too, and are eating on the way.

Yemi spots Blazer and pushes Ikudayisi behind him so it looks like they are not walking together. He quickens his pace and tries to act cool.

Blazer What’s up, blud?

Yemi I’m cool, man.

Ikudayisi (in dodgy American accent) Yeah, what’s poppin?

Yemi AHHH, MAN!

He gives Ikudayisi a dirty look. Blazer laughs.

Blazer Who is dis?

Yemi Erm …

Ikudayisi (dodgy American accent) His older brother.

Blazer I never knew you had a brother.

Yemi I wish I never.

Blazer What?

Yemi Long story — he just come from Nigeria.

Blazer (to Ikudayisi) Ba wo ni. [Hi.]

Yemi What?

Ikudayisi (goes to nudge Blazer) Fellow Nigerian, how now?

Yemi You’re Nigerian? I thought —

Blazer Course I’m Nigerian — one hundred per cent. (To Ikudayisi.) Se en gbadun ilu oyinbo? [Are you enjoying England?]

Ikudayisi Ko bad now. [Not bad.]

Yemi What you two saying?

Blazer Don’t you understand Yoruba?

Yemi No.

Ikudayisi Ko gbo nkan nkan. [He doesn’t understand anything.]

Blazer (to Ikudayisi) Why ain’t you teaching him? Ikudayisi I’ve tried-oh.

Yemi Tried what?

Ikudayisi To teach you Yoruba. (To Blazer.) But he said he don’t give a shit about Nigeria, he telling me I need to change, forget about my heritage, be free like him.

Blazer (to Yemi) Did you say dat?

Yemi Nah, I never.

Ikudayisi Iro ti fo ori e. [Lies are filled in his head.]

Blazer laughs.

Yemi What did he say?

Blazer Dat’s why you need to learn to speak Yoruba, you nah.

Yemi Uhhh.

Blazer So dat you know what people are saying bout you.

Yemi True dat, true dat. I never thought of it like dat.

Ikudayisi What! True what? (To Blazer.) Before he was saying dat he don’t want to have anything to do with Nigeria. He was talking nonsense, saying dat he is free, dat we are from different worlds.

Yemi So? He tries to act like he is American.

Blazer You both got something to learn.

Ikudayisi I’m one hundred per cent proud of being Nigerian.

Yemi Ehh, you think you’re American.

Blazer (to Ikudayisi) Blud, what is that all about?

Ikudayisi When I put on the accent I’m only playing. I know who I am and where I’m from.

Blazer Good, cos that LA Lagos shit pisses me off.

Yemi Me too.

Ikudayisi Me too what? You still don’t know yourself.

Yemi Shut up, man, you’re chatting shit.

Blazer Don’t talk to your brother like dat, man. I swear he said he is older than you.

Yemi So?

Blazer So you need to learn to respect him, you nah. You can’t go around talking to him like that. That’s what makes us different.

Yemi What does?

Blazer Respect.

Yemi From who?

Blazer Da West Indians.

Yemi See, that what I was trying to tell Dayisi bout us being different —

Ikudayisi You were not talking about respect, you were talking rubbish.

Yemi No I wasn’t, I was saying —

Blazer You two should know this already. Respect is something you shouldn’t play wid. My mum taught me that years ago.

He begins to sing.

Money, power, respect is what you need in life.

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