Don't Die with Your Music Still in You by Serena J. Dyer

Author:Serena J. Dyer
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Hay House
Published: 2014-04-18T16:00:00+00:00

WAYNE’S RESPONSE

I abhor the concept of “failure.” I never, ever wanted any of my children to think of themselves as having failed at anything, and that was my motivation for making the title of this chapter one of my top ten secrets for success and inner peace. As Serena heard me say on countless occasions, “There is no failure, only feedback—everything that you do produces a result. My only concern for you is what you do with the results you produce, rather than labeling yourself as a failure and then having to live with that label.”

I have noticed throughout my lifetime that so many people get stuck in the present because they are convinced that what they did or failed to do in the past is a prescription that they are consigned to follow forever. I did not want my children to place any limitations on themselves because of their own personal history. Throughout their lives I would remind them that today is not the first day of the rest of their lives, as the popular saying goes. I would tell them assertively that this is the only day of their lives, so they ought to take time to drink it all in and be present.

Many mornings I would enter the children’s bedrooms and provide their wake-up message, singing in a booming voice, “Oh, what a beautiful morning! Gosh, what a beautiful day! I’ve got a beautiful feeling, everything’s going my way!” Then I would tell them, “This is the only day of your life. There is no past, there is no future, there is only now—so go out and fully enjoy this day.”

The kids would all grumble about their crazy father, but it was important to me that they know and understand the message that Emily Dickinson offered with these five well-considered words, “Forever— is composed of Nows.” Such a simple yet very profound idea, and one that I wanted Serena and all of her siblings to grasp and live fully.

“You can’t get out of now,” I would regularly remind them. “Enjoy this day, this moment. Don’t use a statement like, ‘I’m not good at math,’ or ‘I’m clumsy,’ or ‘I’m not popular’—all based on something that happened in the past—as a reason for not excelling today in math, or not participating in a sporting event, or continuing to label yourself as shy or afraid. Instead, erase that personal history, and see your life today as a blank slate that you can fill in any way that you choose.”

Serena mentioned the wake of the boat as a metaphor for how to give up her personal history. The wake is simply a trail that is left behind, and it is impossible for that wake to be driving the boat that that is your very life.

This message of giving up one’s personal history is something that I too have had to work on throughout my lifetime. In the story that Serena told in this chapter concerning the separation that took place

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