Dallas by Rachelle Mills

Author:Rachelle Mills [Mills, Rachelle]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Limitless Publishing, LLC
Published: 2019-01-28T16:00:00+00:00

***

Week five

Looking in the mirror, I still avoid my eyes, but I brush my teeth, comb my hair, get dressed. I still can’t eat very good, but it’s the little steps that are important. My breath hits the mirror, tainting it with my regret.

Decisions.

I’ve been contemplating my life, what I want, what I need.

I’ve decided that I need to leave, get out on my own for a while. Live my life.

Clayton has been hanging out by the lake waiting for me to get home. His hands are in his pockets, as if holding himself away from me.

“Where have you been, Rya?”

“I was at my parents’ house saying goodbye.”

“Goodbye?” Clayton’s body visibly stiffens, a tension in his shoulders starting to build up.

“I always wanted to travel. I have things I want to do. Places I want to see. I’ve got some money saved up. Why not waste it on me?”

“Will you be back?” He rubs his chest as if it hurts.

“I’m not sure. I don’t know.” It’s my truth. I’m not sure, but for now, I know I want to go. Not because anyone is forcing me to leave, but because I want to leave. Start to live my life that I am going to start living. I can’t wait on Dallas to come back here. What happens if he never comes back? I would have wasted my life waiting for a dream that never will happen.

“When are you going?”

“I’m leaving in the morning.”

“So soon. I thought maybe that—”

“Clayton, I need to tell you something.” Taking a breath in, I square my shoulders to him. He does the same. Ready to meet what my words have to say.

“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I just want you to know that I forgive you. I won’t forget, but I can forgive you. I can’t move on unless I do this.” I grit my teeth together.

“I just want you to know that I only want you to be happy in the future. Thank you for helping me through my time of need. I think in time you’ll be happy. It’s hard to get over someone you’ve loved.” Both of us just look at one another, deep orbs of pine looking at a glacier blue.

A sadness spreads inside me for a lost past, but excitement is starting to build up for a hopeful future.

Letting go is okay. It hurts, but it will be okay in the end.

If you let them go, will they come back?

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