Bastian by Marie Johnston

Author:Marie Johnston [Johnston, Marie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Marie Johnston

Chapter 9

Look at me. Bastian’s voice echoed in her head. Ophelia finished rinsing her hair. If only the water could take the conflicting feelings inside of her down the drain with it.

Who did he think he was?

When she had connected with him in more than one way, that deceitful feeling of being wanted, of being a part of a couple, started creeping in. She couldn’t be vulnerable again. Surviving Nadair’s mental manipulations had been a challenge, but Nadair hadn’t wanted to know anything about her past. He hadn’t cared about what made her tick or why.

Bastian not only acted like he cared, but he knew more about her than her team did. He didn’t know details, but it scared her how easily she could give them up to him.

Then what? He’d know her deepest, darkest secret—and the humiliation that had faded under the heart-wrenching pain.

None of us has kids yet.

Such a casual observation Demetrius had made. Yet not completely accurate.

No, it was. She didn’t have a child. That fleeting moment of her life when she’d felt life grow inside of her had been stolen from her as completely as her youth had been.

With the shower raining tepid water over her, she could tell herself she wasn’t crying.

Damn Bastian for coming into her life. She’d been just fine deluding herself about her misery.

Wanting more was the true danger. A seedy, underhanded male like Nadair using her and failing at monogamy was what she was used to. She’d been with him and still done her job.

If an honorable and caring male like Bastian walked away from her, her malfunctions would affect her—in her normal life and in her work. Getting over him would take more than she cared to give.

She stood under the spray for a few minutes longer. What were the chances Bastian got upset and left?

Her heart sagged at the thought. The reaction wasn’t the hopefulness she’d told herself she’d feel.

She did another round of body wash.

What if Bastian hadn’t left and was only interested in more sex?

Yeah, she’d be up for that. His brand of vanilla sex had been the best she’d ever had. Of course, it hadn’t felt bland and tame at the time.

It was just sex. A natural function. She’d suffered through bad sex, decent sex, and…unwanted sex.

This morning’s round had been both desired and far beyond decent. And all it’d been was girl on top. It’d been mind blowing. Then she’d gotten up and left.

She bared her fangs at the faucet and flicked the water off. Stepping out of the shower, she grabbed an eggplant-colored towel. Slowly, she’d been incorporating her tastes into this small apartment.

With it being winter, she couldn’t do many upgrades on her cabin.

Bastian’s cabin. She didn’t want to ponder the meaning behind her purchasing his old home before they’d ever met.

She’d looked for a place to call her own. After the mess with their government and having to live under a false identity for so long, living in the compound with everyone just hadn’t felt like home.

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