ADULT CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLICS/DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILIES by ACA WSO INC

Author:ACA WSO INC. [ACA WSO INC.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: families, recovery, 12 steps, post traumatic stress disorder, adult children, alcoholism, emotional sobriety., addiction, Laundry List
Publisher: ACA WSO INC.
Published: 2012-08-14T22:00:00+00:00

One Day At a Time

Step Ten reminds us to focus on the present and live in the moment. We live one day at a time in ACA. By living one day at a time, we are free to focus on ourselves and handle the challenges of life as they come. Step Ten helps us avoid feeling overwhelmed by staring too long at the past or obsessing on the future. One day at a time we make progress in our emotional, physical, and spiritual lives. Our past can be our greatest asset, but we remember to focus on the present. We begin to actively participate in our lives and in the lives of others seeking fulfilling relationships. As the Twelve Promises of ACA state, we learn how to have fun and play. We fear authority figures less, and we discover our real identities. We feel more connected to ourselves, and we believe that a God of our understanding is available to us. We are learning how to set boundaries and how to keep them. In relationships, we are learning to choose people who love themselves and can be responsible for themselves. Gradually and slowly we are releasing our dysfunctional behaviors with the help of our ACA group and a Higher Power. These are ACA’s great promises, which are being fulfilled among us daily.

With a Step Ten inventory, we are learning that we have choices. When we arrived at ACA, many of us used control disguised as choice. In reality, we had no choice before working Step One or the remaining Steps of ACA. Before finding ACA, many of us had control usually followed by loss of control and self-blaming despair that left us confused and lost. Our denial locked us into believing we must reapply ourselves. Before recovery, we did try again – countless times – and we failed again. We repeated the same mistakes expecting different results. We blamed others for the results and failed to change our own behavior. We repeatedly picked people who could not love themselves and attempted to extract love from them. Some of us developed a compulsion so strong for another person that we could not easily break away from that person even when we were clearly involved in a relationship that duplicated the abuse of our neglectful homes. Many of us needed intervention to move on and focus on by telling our story to another/ing on tools ofC ourselves.

Real choice means that we give up control and trust our Higher Power to provide the love and help we need to live with flexibility. Real choice is a spiritual continuum beginning at denial and leading to self-honesty, humility, wisdom, and finally discernment. Step Ten is part of that continuum of spiritual discernment. When we inventory our motives and trust our Higher Power, answers seem to emerge. Solutions seem to appear. By practicing

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