The New Dare to Discipline by James Dobson

Author:James Dobson
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781414341743
Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
Published: 2010-05-17T04:00:00+00:00

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

Q When Mrs. Justice told her class that she had many ways to make her rebellious students uncomfortable, I would like to know what those things are. I feel handicapped in my district. What alternatives are there, given the limitations that are now on teachers?

A If a school district is committed to discipline and structure in the classroom, there are many things that Mrs. Justice can do when challenged. Before I suggest a couple, let me say that the strong teacher rarely has to deliver on a threat, just as a father who may be the stronger disciplinarian at home usually punishes less than the mother. There is something in the manner of a confident leader that says, “Don’t push me too far.” Some of it is convincing bluff. Some is in the way the first challenge is handled, as with Mrs. Justice. And some is in the teacher’s ability to express love to the child. Unfortunately, these are not skills that can be easily taught or reduced to a formula in a textbook. They can be learned somewhat from experience and from working with a good role model.

My wife, who was a wonderful teacher and a skilled manager of children, learned a new technique from another teacher who also taught second grade in her school. This woman used an approach that was highly effective with her seven-year-olds. She spoke in very soft tones that forced them to listen very carefully in order to hear her. Somehow, she managed to infuse those thirty children with a quiet, orderly manner just by the way she led the class. Throughout the year, her room was rather like a public library where people whispered and moved quietly around the stacks. It was an impressive, God-given skill. Some have it. Some must work hard to acquire it.

Let me address the question more specifically, now, considering those situations where disruptive students are tough and determined to force a showdown. What then? Everything depends on the age of the class, of course, but let me direct my answer at, say, sixth graders. First, one must decide what is motivating the rebellious behavior. Typically, the noisy kid seeks the attention of the group. Some children had much rather be thought of as obnoxious than to be unthought of at all. For them, anonymity is unacceptable. The ideal prescription is to extinguish their attention-getting behavior and then meet their need for acceptance by less disruptive behavior. An example may help.

I worked with a giddy little sixth grader named Larry whose mouth never shut. He perpetually disrupted the tranquility of his class, setting up a constant barrage of silliness, wise remarks and horseplay. His teacher and I constructed an isolation area in a remote corner of the schoolroom; from that spot he could see nothing but the front of the room. Thereafter, Larry was sentenced to a week in the isolation booth whenever he chose to be disruptive, which effectively eliminated the supporting reinforcement. Certainly, he could

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